


(Does Your Heart Really) Refuse To Remember

by sapphlcpeez



Category: penelope park & josie saltzman - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Betrayal, Cliffhangers, F/F, Gemini Coven - Freeform, Hizzie - Freeform, Malivore - Freeform, PTSD, dark!josie, maybe dark!penelope..., penelope's backstory, posie - Freeform, post 1x14, someone might die?, takes place after 1x14 nothing in s2 happened, the merge
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-05-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:35:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22601092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sapphlcpeez/pseuds/sapphlcpeez
Summary: Penelope never wanted to fall in love, she knew it would only cause her problems, and she was right. She was afraid to let people in, she was scared of the thought that they might hurt her, or break her, or make her feel weak. But this? This was worse, this was her biggest fear, the fear of losing someone she loves, the fear of losing Josie."I don’t understand…" Josie says, tears slowly falling out of her eyes."Well… you will." Penelope fought the urge to break into tears. "One day, you will understand…" she says as she gets closer to the girl crying in front of her, cupping her face with both of her hands and wiping away her tears."Why I did, everything I did." Her voice cracks, tears pouring uncontrollably from her eyes. She hates it, not having control over her feelings, she hates everything about it. She hates how it makes her look weak and fragile.But right now, it didn’t matter. All she could care about at this exact moment was how she was holding her whole world in both of her hands.ORPenelope leaves the school to find a cure that could save Josie from the merge, but things don't go according to her plan.
Relationships: Caroline Forbes & Josie Saltzman, Caroline Forbes & Lizzie Saltzman, Caroline Forbes & Penelope Park, Caroline Forbes/Penelope Park, Hope Mikaelson & Lizzie Saltzman, Hope Mikaelson & Penelope Park, Hope Mikaelson/Josie Saltzman, Hope Mikaelson/Lizzie Saltzman, Hope Mikaelson/Penelope Park, Josie Saltzman & Lizzie Saltzman, Penelope Park & Josie Saltzman, Penelope Park & Lizzie Saltzman, Penelope Park/Josie Saltzman, Penelope Park/Lizzie Saltzman
Comments: 77
Kudos: 227





	1. Before I Let You Go

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys! so i've been writing this fic for a few months now, it's also the first time i'm writing fanfiction at all. English is not my native language and that's why im feeling insecure about this fic, so hopefully you can put up with my mistakes. this story will make you cry, a lot, there's gonna be a lot of angst and heartbreaks, and possibly death... just saying... but also some fluff and lightness. i'm looking forward to see how you all react to the story. i hope you will enjoy reading this, and please leave feedback, even if its harsh. thank you guys♥

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! this is my first time writing a fanfic and english is not my native language so please be easy on me! i hope you'll like it♥

Penelope Park could be described as a stone-cold bitch. She walked around the school as if she owned the place, and of course she was being followed by a posse of witches who would sacrifice their entire family just to get her attention. She is sassy, intelligent, and flirtatious. Making snark comments was her favorite thing, especially when they were directed to a specific blonde witch.

She seems nonchalant and careless, as if she doesn’t know the term 'love' or any warm feeling, she never let her guard down, you could never see her fracture under the light, you could never see the fragile side of her, if that even exists.

Some would describe it like walls were practically built around her heart, never letting anyone get a glimpse of it.

Penelope couldn’t let people see the fragile, vulnerable, side of her. It scared her, it scared the hell out of her to show people that underneath her tough façade, she was actually sensitive, and loving, but caring for others was a sign of weakness.

She knew some people could break her, but she wasn’t going to give them the benefit of the doubt.

So, she shut everyone off. At least that’s how she lived her life until she met Josette Saltzman, the Salvatore Boarding School's head-master's daughter, a siphon-witch from the Gemini Coven, and the twin of Elizabeth Saltzman, who's also known as the school's most popular witch.

Josie is sweet, kind, shy, very thoughtful and caring. She always puts her loved ones first and will risk her own life and happiness for them. Some would say this trait will be the end of her eventually.

She is a cheerful girl, her smile could light the entire world, and fill everyone's hearts with joy and peace, but despite all the brightness the girl brings to life, she also has a lot of darkness within her.

Sometimes it feels like she's an hourglass that holds inside a huge amout of darkness, and with time she slowly fractures, the darkness threatening to set free.

She struggled her entire life with co-dependency, being a twin is already a hard job, but being the twin of Lizzie? That was ten times harder.

Lizzie loves the spotlight and the attention, she _lives_ for it. Her wants and needs were always above everyone else's, even above Josie's. Josie never complained though, she loves her sister and she would happily do anything for her, but it wasn’t always easy to live in Lizzie's shadow, especially not when it came to Josie's love interests, because _Lizzie always won_.

When Penelope and Josie first met, Penelope practically _melted_ when she saw those big chocolate brown orbs, so big and beautiful, and when she smiled? She felt her whole body tingling, she felt this weird, funny feeling in her stomach. That smile was probably the most beautiful smile the raven-haired girl had ever seen. And then she knew, Josie Saltzman was only going to cause her problems, she was going to change her whole life perspectives, make her doubt and feel things she never wanted to feel.

It terrified her, the thought of letting anyone see her being vulnerable? That was her _biggest_ fear, the thing she had been trying to avoid since she was a child.

Penelope is a clever girl, sharp, self-assured and confident, very calculated, always had everything planned, every single thing she's doing must have a specific purpose. But the one thing she never planned on was falling in love, she didn’t want to, she knew it would only get in her way and sabotage her plans for life, she didn’t believe in love. _She couldn’t_.

She was 14 years old when she first got into the Salvatore Boarding School, and that was when she fell head over heels almost immediately with the head-master's daughter, Josie.

Josie was the only one Penelope cared about, the only one who got to see a glimpse of Penelope's well-guarded heart. Their love was intense, passionate, strong, it was the kind of love that people only talk about in movies, and it was _real_.

Now, years later, both of them stand in the exact same place where they first met, they have been through a lot since then. Although their love never grew any weaker, they weren’t together anymore. They both changed, they are no longer as naïve as they were before, they went through a lot of challenges, pain, and heartbreaks, all of those things only made them grow farther apart.

Now they stand there, hurt, angry and broken. Josie finally read the letter that Penelope had written for her months ago, a letter that informed the brunette that she was leaving the school.

"You weren’t going to say goodbye?" the brunette finally said.

"I did… in my letter, which I'm guessing you’ve finally read." Penelope sighed, turning around to face the girl.

"Belgium?"

"My mom got a job." She explained, though that wasn’t the real reason for her sudden leave.

"Penelope… don’t leave." The girl said, desperation was showing on her face, her voice practically begging her to stay.

"You know for weeks… I'd been hoping you'd give me _one_ reason to stay. Instead you gave me a _thousand_ reasons to go. Losing, on purpose? Always putting yourself second?"

One can hear how hurt Penelope is just by listening to her voice and words, her eyes are shining, water blocking her vision, her smile sad and broken. She’s frustrated.

That always had been the major problem in their relationship, co-dependency.

Penelope always expected Josie to be more selfish, to think about herself first, to put her wants and needs before everyone else's, but she never did.

It hurt her to see the girl she loves never doing something solely for her own good. And that was the reason why Penelope had to let Josie go, because she couldn’t stand the thought of being another person Josie had to care for, another person Josie would put before herself, another weight on Josie's shoulders.

So, she let her go, hurting herself in the process, but she had to, even if it hurt her more than anything in the world.

"My heart can't take it, and I will not wait around and watch what happens to you next." She continues.

She has her heart on her sleeve at this point, she is completely vulnerable. That is the affect Josette Saltzman has on her, has always had on her.

"What are you talking about?" she asks, not understanding the meaning behind those words.

"You know the pens, I was using to spy?" The shorter girl says with a quirky expression while pulling out a notebook from her bag, "This record all of it." She explains as she's handing it over to josie, "It's basically a log of everything written at the Salvatore School."

"And I want you to read what your dad wrote, about something called 'The Merge'."

and there it was, the secret she had been keeping for so long was finally falling out of her lips, but the burden of the secret hadn’t left her. She didn’t feel the weight pulling off her shoulders, it was still there, still weighing heavily on her heart.

* * *

Penelope first learned about 'The Merge' when she was 16.

It was at the twin's 15th birthday, Penelope was busy preparing their birthday party along with some other students and teachers. She went to grab some the birthday cake from the kitchen, and while she walked there, she overheard Alaric, aka the twins' father, talking with their mother, Caroline Forbes, a fierce, confident and independent vampire, who was somewhere in Europe 'recruiting' new supernatural students for the school.

Penelope hadn’t heard much, she hadn’t even meant to listen, until she heard a part from their conversation that caught her attention. "You can't miss it Caroline, not when you know we might not get to celebrate both of their birthdays for much longer." Alaric said, desperation and frustration was evident in his voice.

It wasn’t the first time Caroline didn’t show up for the twins' birthday, it wasn’t surprising anymore when their father had to tell them that their mother wasn’t coming, but it was still disappointing.

The raven-haired girl didn’t understand what was the meaning behind that sentence, she wanted to keep listening to consume more information, she knew she might get caught if she'll do it, but she had to risk it, she couldn’t help it, the curiosity intrigued her.  
  
"Hey Pen, what are you doing?" Josie asked, causing Penelope to jump. "Oh, I was just grabbing some stuff for the party. What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you go get ready for your birthday party?" the raven-haired girl turned her attention back to taller girl, wrapping her hands around her waist.

"I should… but I was kinda thinking if you wanted to get out of here? With me?" the brunette had asked, grinning at the girl in front of her, big brown eyes meeting emerald eyes in the process.

"What? Jojo there is a whole party down stairs only waiting for you!" the girl raised her brows worryingly at the brunette.

"I know… but I was thinking about how I want to spend my birthday and honestly, I just want to be alone with you. Besides, this party is more for Lizzie than it is for me. So… please?" she was pouting, that cute pout that always managed to make Penelope's heart melt, Also the way she expressed what _she_ wanted made Penelope's knees grow weaker. Josie knew she couldn’t resist her offer.

"Alright! Alright, fine. You know I can't resist this face. But if we'll get in trouble, I'll blame it on you." She said defeatedly, a smug grin is showing on Josie's face.

The two went away to spend the rest of Josie's birthday together, but that sentence, that _damned_ sentence hadn’t left Penelope's mind.

She was dying to know what it meant, it drove her insane. She knew Caroline and Alaric were hiding something from their daughters, and she needed to know what it was, she needed to know how it affects the twins.

So, Penelope being Penelope, she made a plan. She gave the entire school, including the twins and Alaric, enchanted pens, as a Christmas gift. And whenever someone used the pens she gave them, it would magically appear in Penelope's notebook.

_Penelope is a clever girl, sharp, self-assured and confident, very calculated, always had everything planned, every single thing she's doing must have a purpose._

That’s how she found out about 'The Merge', about the antique ceremony the Gemini Coven did every time a pair of twins, born to the Gemini Coven, got to the age of 22.

The twins would 'battle', measure their magical powers and strength, and the one with the most power would win. But there was also a catch.

You couldn’t win without losing something. You couldn’t win without having the weaker twin die.

 _And there it was,_ Penelope finally had all the information she needed. She found out about the big secret Alaric and Caroline were holding. That’s when she realized she might lose the love of her life, and as you can imagine, her entire world collapsed at the very same moment.

She didn’t feel any satisfaction, even after finally achieving her goal, instead, it felt like everything was falling apart.

Her chest was aching sharply, the ache was pressing harshly on her lungs and heart, she felt like she couldn’t breathe. Every breath she took felt like a challenge, it felt like a thousand knives were cutting through her throat, not letting the air reach into her lungs.

Penelope never wanted to fall in love, she knew it would only cause her problems, and she was right. She was afraid to let people in, she was scared of the thought that they might hurt her, or break her, or make her feel weak. But this? This was worse, this was her biggest fear, the fear of losing someone she loves, the fear of losing Josie.

* * *

"I don’t understand…" Josie says, tears slowly falling out of her eyes.

"Well… you will." Penelope fought the urge to break into tears. "One day, you will understand…" she says as she gets closer to the girl crying in front of her, cupping her face with both of her hands and wiping away her tears.

"Why I did, _everything I did_." Her voice cracks, tears pouring uncontrollably from her eyes. She hates it, not having control over her feelings, she hates everything about it. She hates how it makes her look weak and fragile.

But right now, it didn’t matter. All she could care about at this exact moment was how she was holding her _whole world_ in both of her hands.

Tears kept falling out of the brunette's eyes, she froze, she didn’t say a word, she felt like she couldn’t move, her entire body was failing her, not listening to her brain's orders, to move, or to say _anything_.

She wanted to speak, she really did, but she felt this huge lump pressing her throat, not letting any word escape her mouth.

Penelope wiped her tears from her cheeks once again and felt how the girl was leaning into her touch. She took a moment to look into those chocolate eyes, the eyes she could drown in, the eyes that always gave her reassurance when she needed it, and pressed their fore-heads together.

A sad smile was dancing on her lips, her entire body was shivering, shaking, her heart was beating so fast, almost jumping out of her chest. A beat passed through them until Penelope closed the distance between them and kissed the other girl.

Unlike their recent kisses, this one was soft, warm, filled with want and affection, it felt like it was coming back to home, coming back to the lips she already knew. Except that this time, this kiss was a final goodbye.

When their lips leave each other's, they don't move from the fore-head touch, they want everything around them to freeze so they could stay like this a bit longer, they wanted it all to last forever, to capture the moment and keep it for an eternity.

But then reality hit, and Penelope pulls Josie into a tight embrace, not wanting to let her go. Tears kept running from their eyes, their emotions were all over the place. "I love you Jojo." The shorter girl cries out, finally expressing her feelings in words, finally letting those three words escape her lips.

That was the first time Penelope ever confessed her feelings for the girl, but it didn’t scare her as much as she thought it would. "I love you with all of my, obnoxious, selfish, evil heart." Penelope continues, scrunching her nose and chuckling painfully at Josie, letting all of her feelings float across the room. Letting everyone know how she felt at this exact moment.

Penelope never felt the need to tell Josie she loves her, she believed more in expressing her feelings in actions than in words, and she made sure to show Josie how much she loves her. She knew Josie knew how she felt about her, but when she let those three words escape her mind and lips, she felt relieved, as if she was holding onto another secret.

A sad laugh escaped Josie's lips, she couldn’t move, she wanted to take it all in. She exhaled a breath she didn’t know she was holding, she wanted to say something so badly, she wanted to yell how much she loves Penelope, she wanted to tell her how much she doesn’t want her to leave, but she didn’t say a word. She just stood there, frozen, her entire body screaming, her heart was aching for more, but she couldn’t.

And so, the raven-haired girl with the emerald eyes left, taking one last look at Josie's features, memorizing every inch of her beautiful face and burning it into her brain.

The raven-haired girl with the emerald eyes turned on her heels without looking back. Josie stood there, watching as half of her walking away, leaving with no looking back, but it didn’t matter, nothing did anymore.

* * *

The next few days passed painfully slow for Josie. The school halls felt empty without her ex-girlfriend around. She missed her, she missed their flirtatious bickering exchanges, she missed hearing her voice, she missed all of it.

The realization hadn’t hit her yet, she couldn’t bear the thought that the girl she loves is now oceans away from her, and she hates herself for it, for not giving her _one_ reason to stay.

Josie tried to distract herself, to keep herself from thinking about her ex-girlfriend, she even tried to research about 'The Merge' like Penelope told her to… _Penelope_. But it didn’t help, her mind kept wandering back to the raven-haired girl, the pain and guilt were crippling inside of her, every inch of her skin wanted to scream.

She never thought of it, of the chance that she might lose Penelope, she never even considered it. Penelope had always been there, even when she wasn’t wanted, she was _always_ there, that’s why the thought of her absence seemed so ridiculous and unrealistic to Josie, it just never seemed possible for Penelope not to be around, but apparently, she was wrong.

It took Josie a few days to understand what was happening, to cope with the fact that Penelope was no longer there, and to cope with the terms of her dark fate and her future, if she even has one.

She read what her father wrote in the notebook Penelope had given her, but it didn’t say much, she needed to know more, she had to find out every tiny detail about the merge.

The brunette spent the last days researching, crying, grieving, yelling. She was a mess, she was furious, angry, in unimaginable pain. She was angry about the world, about her father for not telling her and Lizzie about 'The merge', about Penelope for leaving her to deal with everything alone. She was scared. No, she was _terrified_.

The last few days weren’t easy for Penelope either, she was hurt, broken and desperate. Her mind was racing with thoughts, her heart was filled with doubts.

 _was this the right decision?_ That was the question that kept popping into her mind, swirling a knife in her heart each time.

A part of her felt incredibly selfish for leaving the girl she loves with this huge truth-bomb, especially when said girl doesn’t know what Penelope is planning.

The older witch might have been dishonest with the brunette, she lied when she said the reason for her sudden leave was her mother, but she knew she couldn’t tell her the truth.

She knew Josie would never forgive herself if she knew that the real reason Penelope had left was because she couldn’t sit around and do nothing, she had to fight, she had to risk it all so Josie could have a chance at life, a chance at having a future, and hopefully a future with her. She couldn’t just stand by and watch how the love of her life dies in front of her, slowly fades away, and she wouldn’t.

It hurt her to think that the brunette probably thinks the worst of her right now, despises every fiber of her, hates her with a burning passion. But it didn’t matter, she didn’t mind being the villain in Josie's story, as long as it meant that it would keep her safe.

* * *

It was about 01:17am, the weather was cold, the streets of Leuven, Belgium were silent and empty, the lights were off, no one would wander around outside in these hours, well unless they are an immortal vampire of course.

Caroline lived in this city for the past 3 months, she knew every inch of the city, she liked it, she liked the weather, the people, and she loved the fact that it was a silent city past mid-night. It was almost impossible to find anyone walking down the streets after 00:00am, but she liked it, she liked the silence and the cold in the night, and she loved it when the streets were filled with people, tourists and locals, and music in the day light.

She was walking in the south side of the city, she needed some fresh air and quiet after a long day of trying to find a cure for the merge and failing, again, probably for the thousand time.

She was frustrated, she feared she'd never find a cure for the merge, she feared she'd never be able to save her beloved daughters, and the thought of actually losing one of them was almost paralyzing.  
  
The blonde was walking down the street, cold wind blowing in her face, making her entire body shiver, but it was the cold that made her drown in her thoughts, until she heard a noise from behind her that shook her off from her trance.

She turned around to find the source of that sound, but she didn’t see a thing, she continued walking until she heard quiet steps behind her. Someone was following her, which is stupid because they probably don't know she's a powerful vampire who could hear their racing heartbeat from miles away.

She turned around once again, "Who is this? Come out!" she yelled into the darkness of the streets, no one showed up. "You know I can hear you right? Come out before I'll find you and make you regret for not showing your face earlier." The blonde threatened, she waited patiently until she saw a shadow coming out from a bush they were hiding behind, she didn’t recognize the face, it was too dark to see anything.

The shadow walked forward to her direction, so slowly it was almost painful to watch. They got close enough to Caroline for her to recognize them.

"Penelope?" the vampire recognized her daughter's ex-girlfriend features, confusion flooded her, why was she there? "What are you doing here? In Belgium? Following me in the night?" the blonde bombarded her with too many questions at once, "Did you lose your mind? Why are you here?" she yelled, she was hysterical.

"Relax! I needed to talk with you." She said, trying to calm down the confused blonde vampire in front of her.

"And you think that following me in the middle of the night is a good idea?" The blonde yelled dramatically and frowned at the other girl.

"I guess I wasn’t fully thinking about it…" Penelope nervously smiled and scratched the back of her neck, trying to feign innocence.

" Does your mother know you are here?" she continued with the questions, still not understanding what the underage girl doing, wandering alone in the streets of Leuven in the middle of the night.

"She doesn’t, but it doesn’t matter, we need to talk about something important." She swallowed the lump in her throat and dropped her hand to her hip in an attempt to compose herself, "We need to talk about 'The Merge'."

* * *

Caroline dragged Penelope into a small, modern apartment that was placed in the center of the city just beside the center square where all the tourists would visit. "How do you know about the merge?" the vampire demanded answers, Penelope felt like she was in the middle of an interrogation.

"I overheard you and Alaric talking about it, happy? Can we please talk now?" she responded indifferently, unconcerned by Caroline's angry tone.

"Why are you here now?" the blonde kept searching for answers.

"Well if you'd let me speak maybe you would’ve known by now. But since you don’t, I guess you'll never find out." The raven-haired girl said, annoyance is clearly evident in her voice.

"I'm listening." Caroline leaned over the wall, crossing her arms and waiting patiently for the girl to provide her some answers.

"Oh my god, thank you." The girl rolled her eyes and groaned dramatically as she sat down, catching Caroline's unimpressed glare.

"Well, I knew you were somewhere in Europe, and I knew this whole 'recruiting new students for the school'," she said as she air-quoted her last phrase, "was a complete bullshit since no one new ever came to school," she continued.

"Hey! Language!" the blonde yelled and heavily sighed, only causing the raven-haired girl to wave her hand at her dismissively.

"Anyway, I did my one plus one and realized you were here, searching for a cure. So simple as that, I did a locator spell and here we are." The girl said simply and clearly, making the blonde roll her eyes. "And, I wanted to offer you my help, to find the cure." Penelope finally said.

"What? Are you insane? No way in hell!" the vampire lashed out.

"Before you deny my help, please listen to me, okay?" Penelope sighed, feeling like this was a bad idea.

Caroline looked at the girl and at her extremely frustrated expressions and nodded, giving her a positive answer.

"Well… I tried to make Josie stronger… I really tried, but it didn’t work no matter how many times I tried." She started, stopping to swallow the painful lump in her throat. "I couldn’t help her like that, and that’s why I'm here, I won't just stand by and do nothing, I must do something." She continued, her pain was already showing on her face.

It annoyed her how no matter how intimidating she wanted to seem and sound she couldn’t, and it was all because of that one girl. The raven-haired girl immediately wiped away the tiny tear that was threatening to leave her eye and tried to regain her composter,

"well, by the way I see it, it's either you'll accept my offer and we can work together, side by side to find that cure, or, I will do it by my own. Which is way more risky and dangerous. It's your choice." She said with an empty expression on her face, just patiently waiting for the blonde to react.

"God, you really know how to manipulate people." Caroline groaned, "Alright, fine, we'll do it together." She said defeatedly, making Penelope stiffen in her chair, sensing her victory.

"But listen, if it gets too dangerous then I don’t care how much you love my daughter or care for her because I will send you back to where you belong, I'm not going to let you risk your life for it." She said in her serious tone, her mom instinct was evident and clear, she was worried this would hurt Penelope in ways she couldn’t even imagine, both mentally and physically, but it didn’t seem to worry Penelope.

The raven-haired girl let out a smug smirk, knowing she won this argument.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyy thank you sm for reading and please let me know what you thought about it♥


	2. Dancing The Memories Away

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some heavy feelings and unanswered questions, a slight dive into Penelope and Josie's past. Penelope and Caroline's dynamic and also Hope and Josie friendship. enjoy :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! sorry for the long wait for the next chapter, i hope you'll like it :)  
> btw there are some posie flashbacks here

It was early in the morning, Penelope was sitting on the couch while sipping her coffee, her eyes were sleepy and tired after a long night of countless failed attempts to finally fall asleep. Her expression was empty, and her entire body felt numb.

She was drowning in her thoughts, questioning all of her life decision that led her to this place, to this situation. To leave for Belgium and team up with her ex-girlfriend's vampire mom, to put her life on the risk for the faint chance she might find a cure for the merge, which might not even exist, and to leave the one person she loves the most behind.

That was until Caroline interrupted her with yet another, extremely annoying question.

"When did you find out?"

"We've already been through this, I told you everything yesterday." The girl answered dryly, continuing to sip from her coffee and watching the blonde pace restlessly in the living room.

"Have you told anyone? Have you told Josie?" Caroline was nervous and anxious, on edge. She needed answers and she needed them now.

Penelope froze for a moment, the day she told Josie about the merge was replaying in her mind like a movie, she remembered every single detail. She remembered the morning, she woke up knowing it would be her last day at the school, the last day she would see Josie. She remembered how it made her feel, frustrated, gloomy, disappointed.

It made her feel like a failure, for not being able to do this the easy way.

She remembered how all she wanted to do was to spend every single moment of the day with Josie, even when the brunette didn’t want her around. She remembered even doing something as ridiculous as attending miss mystic falls, the misogynist, archaic tradition, just for her.

She remembered how many inches were separating her from Josie while standing next to the fire place. She remembered how her body craved to close the gap between them the entire time they were standing there, craving for the familiar warmth of the other girl. She remembered how her heart was beating so fast it was almost jumping out of her chest, how her entire body shivered under her black sweater. She remembered how hard she tried to fight the tears but with no success, and how her stomach flipped when Josie asked her to stay.

She remembered how much it hurt her that she had to be the one who broke the news to the girl, how she had to break her heart and her hope for a future, she remembered how hard she squeezed her eyes, trying to wake up from the nightmare she was in. She remembered the way Josie's face filled with confusion after she told her, how she couldn’t understand the weight of her words. She remembered the way she could feel the other girl's heart break right in front of her, and how much it made her want to scream out of her chest.

She remembered everything.

The raven-haired girl regained her tired but confident composure, trying to shake herself from the painful memories.

"I did." She answered simply and surely, the memories finally stopped playing in her mind.

"Oh god." The blonde sighed dramatically while placing both of her hands atop of her head, her pace became more restless and troubled than ever.

Penelope followed Caroline with her eyes, completely indifferent and careless about what's going in the vampire's mind. If she had to be honest, she would say she kind of find it entertaining how the blonde was freaking out about almost everything.

The blonde suddenly stopped her pacing, she took a huge breath, almost sucking all the air in the room, calming herself down. "How did you react… when you found out?" she looked directly towards the younger girl, her tone was softer, and her eyes radiated something different, warmer.

She saw how her question suddenly made the other girl flinch at the hearing of it, how it caught her off-guard. Her expression changed in a heartbeat, something cold took over.

Penelope took herself a moment to regain that memory, replacing the painful memories from her last day at the school with other painful memories, and the pain that she felt in that exact moment appeared effortlessly. She remembered how painful it was for her to do something as basic as breathing, or moving at all, she remembered the feeling of that dark cloud just hovering above her, she remembered the anxiety and the fear, how terrified she was. She remembered it all, maybe she never truly forgot.

"I don’t know… whatever." She stopped the rush of pain she felt crippling inside before it would get out of control, and answered simply, pretending like the memories didn’t affect her at all.

But the blonde could see right through her, like glass, she could tell how badly it had gotten to her, and how badly it messed up with her. She knew it wasn’t _whatever_ , but she the decided to not dig any further, Penelope will tell her whenever she's ready.

An awkward silence was sitting in the room, Caroline looked at the girl, watching her attempts to ignore that tear that was escaping from the gates of her eye. She regretted asking her that question, sometimes she needed to learn when to shut up.

"I'm sorry." The vampire quickly said, her eyes softened, and a comforting smile appeared on her face.

"Sorry for what?" the girl asked with half-hearted smile, swallowing hard the lump that was in her throat. She tried to cover the great pain she was feeling.

"For everything. For what happened between you and my daughter, for you learning about the merge…" Caroline's words were genuine, she did feel sorry. Penelope was way too young when she heard about the merge, she should’ve been happy, living her life, being a teenager, but instead there she was, with Caroline, putting her own happiness aside and risking her life trying to find a cure for a horrible, archaic curse that is threatening to end the life of the girl she loves.

The words of the vampire filled Penelope's heart with sadness, but also with weirdly and unexpectedly warmth.

Her lips parted, her breath became shaky, her eyes were glued to the floor while a river of tears kept flowing through them quickly. She wiped away her tears, she felt so ridiculous, it wasn’t like her to be so weak.

Penelope let out a small, mocking, chuckle, mocking herself for acting so foolishly, and took another sip from her coffee.

The vampire sat next to the witch, her hand rested on her knee, giving it a reassuring squeeze, "You can count on me from now on, I'm here for you." The older woman said softly, pulling the young girl into a warm hug.

Her gesture caused the other girl to look at the blonde and smile at her. It wasn’t a happy smile, but that’s how the girl expressed her gratitude.

The silence that filled the room didn’t feel so awkward anymore, it was calming, comforting even, it simply felt safe.

* * *

It was a special day at the Salvatore school, it was the homecoming prom day, and the theme was a masquerade ball, Lizzie's idea obviously.

It was 1pm, the entire school was busy arranging the last details of the upcoming party, the witches took care of the decorations for the night, the werewolves got the food and drinks, and the vampires were busy working on a special playlist for the night. The excitement of the students was felt in the school.

And of course, Lizzie, being Lizzie Saltzman, took the charge to arrange the party, she couldn’t trust on anyone to make it as perfect as she always imagined it to be, she could only trust herself.

The blonde was excited for the night, she waited for the homecoming prom since she was little, she planned every detail of it, her dress, the party, the school decoration, and she even planned who would be her date for the prom.

Lizzie is a control freak, just like her mother, they both shared the exact same passion for big events and big parties, for fancy dresses and for fashion, they were so similar you could never guess that they weren’t actually related.

"Josie! Are you serious? You're still sleeping?" Lizzie barged into their shared room only to find her sister still lying in her bed, covered in a blanket from head to toe.

Her raising tone caused Josie to jump. The brunette slowly rubbed her tired eyes and sat on her bed, her hair was messy, and she was wearing the exact same sloppy pajama she wore for the past 2 days. "What do you want?" Josie asked sleepily, completely uninterested in what her twin had to say.

In the past two weeks, ever since Penelope left, Josie almost hadn’t left her room at all, and if she did it was to either eat, which was rare, or to bury herself with books about the merge at the library.

She missed classes, she didn’t show up at parties, she wasn’t outside at all, she spent her time either sleeping, crying, or researching.

Lizzie hadn’t seen her sister acting like that since the time when Penelope broke up with her, but this time it was even worse, it was like some kind of darkness took over Josie, darkness that Lizzie had never seen before.

"What do I want? Oh, let me see… I don’t know, maybe I just want you to go and help arranging the party instead of sleeping through the day?" Lizzie said sarcastically, frowning at her sister.

Josie rolled her eyes at her sister's raising tone and ignored her and her judgement, she didn’t want to hear about it. Instead she leaned into the dresser that was beside her bed and opened the drawer just to pull a journal, a brown leathered journal that was decorated with her ex's signature and some stickers and signs.

She caressed the journal, her finger tips stopped when they reached Penelope's signature. Her eyes filled with sadness once again, memories of the night where Penelope had left flashed into her mind all over again, in fact they never truly left.

Lizzie kept talking and preaching to Josie, but she didn’t hear her anymore, it's like the entire world went silent and Josie was caught in a bubble with herself and her thoughts.  
  
The blonde finally realized she was talking to the air this entire time, noticing that her twin was holding a journal and her eyes were glued to it, filled with sadness.

She got closer to her sister and sat next to her, that’s when she realized that the journal Josie held belonged to Penelope, her evil ex, the one who _shall not be named._

It was never a secret that Lizzie disliked Penelope with a burning passion, and she wanted, she _really_ wanted, to just yell at her sister and tell her to forget about Satan incarnate, to forget about the pain she caused her, to just snap out of it, but she stopped herself.

Lizzie might be too opinionated and judgmental sometimes, but she did have the common sense to know when the time is right to express her thoughts, and this wasn’t the right time.

And besides, she knew her sister better than anyone, she knew how much Penelope meant to her, and what she must be feeling right now.

"I know what you're going through right now," the blonde started, looking softly at her sister, "I know you are upset, but you can't stay locked in this room all the time. It's not healthy, and it's not helping you." She continued, slowly placing her hand on Josie's shoulder as an attempt to comfort her.

But all it did was the complete opposite. Josie looked at her and laughed with disdain, "How could you possibly know how I feel if you never even care enough to ask?" The brunette lashed out, she stood up to distance herself from her twin sister, "You don’t even know the real me." She said pointedly and sharply, her expression wore a darker shade.

"Excuse me?" the blonde chuckled nervously and stood up as well, "What is that supposed to mean?" Lizzie wore an irritated expression on her face.

"You know exactly what I mean, if you cared about me you would’ve told me that Penelope was leaving the second you heard about it. Do you even realize how incredibly inconsiderate that was of you?" Josie raised her voice, she was infuriated, and hurt. There was genuine sadness in her tone.

"So, this is about her? Really Josie?" the other twin said with disbelief, "You two were broken up for almost a year! Why would you still care if she is around or not?" the blonde lashed out on her twin, causing the brunette to frown.

"You wouldn’t understand…" Josie let out a deep sigh, her heart felt heavy, her head was aching, she was too tired to continue this conversation, she was too tired to do anything.

"It doesn’t matter anymore," she gave up, "She left, and there was nothing I could do about it. Now could you please let me get back to bed?" the girl said exasperated.

Lizzie huffed and walked out of the room, she felt helpless, and defeated, she was upset she couldn’t help Josie.  
  
The brunette felt bad for snapping at her sister, she felt guilty for not telling Lizzie about her secret. She knows about the merge for a while now, but she still hadn’t got the chance to tell her twin about their cruel fate.

She was worried on how it would affect Lizzie, how it would make her feel, especially when they don’t have all the information. So, she decided to keep it to herself, to keep carrying this huge burden on her shoulders, at least until she'll gather more information about the ceremony.

Although regardless of everything, Josie was deeply upset with her twin, for how selfish she was for not telling her about Penelope, for how completely ignorant she was acting towards her feelings for her ex, pretending like Josie hadn’t spent the entire year crying on Lizzie's shoulder over that one special girl.

It made her feel like she wasn’t enough for her sister, like she wasn’t good enough or interesting enough for her sister to pay attention, to know when something is going on, to know her true feelings, or to even just care enough to ask her how she felt.

It made her feel miserable for not being able to depend on the one person that will always be there for her.

She really needed to clear her mind, to breathe fresh air, to get farther away from her twin and from all the fuss about the prom, and to try to forget about her fate, and about a certain girl that hadn’t left her mind ever since she first met her.

Josie walked to the old mill and breathed the fresh air in, there was a calming silence outside since all the students were busy with the last preparations for the Homecoming prom.

She wanted silence to feel some peace and quiet, a feeling that now felt so unfamiliar to her. She wanted to calm herself, but the silence and that specific location she chose betrayed her mind and only made her thoughts wander back to the raven-haired witch she loved so much.

* * *

_She was 13, it was the beginning of the new year, the brunette and her twin were at the school's center lobby, right next to fireplace with some of their friends when their father arrived with a new student._

_"Girls, meet Penelope Park. She is a very wise witch, we found her in New Orleans." Alaric introduced the new girl to his daughters, Josie couldn’t help but pay attention to how the girl's eyes looked down at the floor when Alaric mentioned New Orleans._

_"Hi, I'm Lizzie, and this is my twin, Josie." Lizzie Introduced them to the witch and offered her hand for her. Penelope shook Lizzie's hand shyly, and then turned her gaze to the other twin and smiled at her._

_Josie caught her gaze and felt like she was turning red. She offered the new girl a warm smile, "Welcome to the Salvatore school." The brunette said softly._

_She could swear that she had never seen anyone as beautiful as Penelope. Something about her dark long hair and her emerald eyes with the golden flecks, and her full pink-ish lips made Josie feel a weird funny feeling in her stomach._

_She couldn’t get her eyes off the girl in front of her, until Lizzie shook her from her trance. "Come on, let's show you around."_ _The blonde said cheerfully while looping her arm with Penelope's, and Josie followed the two girls from behind._

_Lizzie held Penelope closer to her while showing her around, trying to impress the new girl and maybe make a new friend, but Penelope seemed unimpressed by how tightly the blonde grabbed her arm, or about how quirky and excited Lizzie got whenever she showed Penelope one of the classrooms, and she sure wasn’t impressed by how the cute brunette was walking behind them instead of next to her._

_At any given chance, the new girl glanced towards the other twin, always sending her way a warm and soft grin_ , _and Josie always grinned back at her, and her eyes always shone as she did._

_"Well, this is the finale station, this is the old mill. We don’t have another mill, but we call it like that for some reason." The blonde explained._

_"Well there is a party here tonight and I must go plan my outfit and get ready, and I'm gonna need your help Josie." Lizzie looked directly at her twin, making it clear that the girl had no choice._

_Josie was disappointed by how the tour quickly ended, she really enjoyed watching Penelope glancing towards her and smiling. She wanted to protest and refuse to help her sister, but she wasn’t able to do that, she would never be able to do something against her sister's wishes._

_She wore a disappointed pout, but she stayed silent._

_Penelope didn’t know the brunette, but any person who is not blind could see how much Josie didn’t want to follow her sister._

_"Hey, if you don’t mind, I would really like Josie to keep showing me around, I just fear I would get lost." The raven-haired girl offered, "If that’s okay by you." She turned her gaze to Josie, who was clearly biting the inside of her cheek._

_Lizzie narrowed her eyes and felt the rage inside of her at the other girl's words. Now it was clear she wouldn’t get along with Penelope Park._

_"Josie?" Lizzie turned her gaze to her sister as well, her tone was annoyed and the irritable expression she wore could not go unnoticed._

_Josie scratched the back of her head anxiously, she wanted to stay with Penelope so bad, but she really felt badly disappointing her sister._

_"Lizzie dad said we need to show her around, I will join you later, I promise." The girl said hesitatingly, it might not be visible, but her body felt like it was shaking uncontrollably._

_"Ugh, whatever." The blonde rolled her eyes at her sister's response and walked away quickly._

_"Thank you." Penelope said with a slight smirk on her face, making a direct eye connection with Josie._

_"Sure." The girl answered shyly, quickly lowering her head in an attempt to make minimal eye contact_

_The brunette became a bit anxious, she bit her bottom lip nervously and played with her own sleeve, it was easier for her to just walk behind her twin and the cute new girl, without having to engage with conversation._

_"So, are you gonna tell me what's so special about this place?" Penelope noticed how the other girl was playing nervously with her sleeves and decided to engage first._

_The question caught Josie off-guard, like it was pulling her out of her own bubble._

_"It's… it's where the seniors smoke weed… and is also where all the 'underground' parties happen." The taller girl said shyly, her voice was trembling, and her fingers were playing with each other restlessly, her gaze was fixated on the floor and an awkward silence was sitting between the two girls for a few beats._

_"Well… that’s cool, I guess." The other witch said simply, feeling the desperate need to break the awkward silence._

_"So, are you gonna tell me about you? I mean I've already heard everything about your twin, for example now I know how much she loves talking about herself…" The raven-haired girl said sarcastically while sending Josie a coy smile, "but I know nothing about you, well besides your name." She continued, letting out a witty chuckle, causing Josie to slowly turn her gaze towards her, a shy smile appeared on the brunette's face._

_"What do you want to know?" The girl asked softly, her fingers cooled down a bit._

_She walked towards the shorter girl and they both sat on the grass, leaning on a wide tree trunk. "Surprise me Saltzman." The witch said in a playful tone, wearing a smug smirk. Josie giggled and narrowed her eyes, trying to come up with something._

_Penelope paid attention carefully to the girl's facial expressions, she could almost see her brain whirls spinning. "You know you look really cute like that?" The raven-haired girl seemed amused, her comment made Josie blush even harder, if that was possible, distracting her from her thoughts._

_"Like what?" The girl asked nervously. "Like that, with your eyes all narrowed, it almost makes you look smart." Penelope said sarcastically, causing the brunette to playfully hit her, "Shut up!", they both started to cackle, their laughter was filling the entire space, making both of the girls feel contentment._

_After the laughter died down, Penelope kept smiling at the brunette, still watching her thinking._

_"Okay, don’t judge me, but… I kinda like to set things on fire." The taller witch immediately covered her face with her palms, feeling embarrassed by her weird hobby, but for her surprise, Penelope didn’t mock her for it._

_"Well then, it’s a good thing that I like to watch the world burn." The raven-haired girl commented with a witty tone and a smug smile, winking playfully at the other girl._

* * *

Josie let out a sad smile reminiscing those memories of her ex-girlfriend, missing the happier times of her life.

She walked inside the old mill, passing next to a small burnt tree, causing her to chuckle at the memory of how she accidentally lit it on fire while practicing magic with Penelope.

"What's so funny?" A voice from behind her caused Josie to jump and turn around just to face Hope sitting on a bench behind her, her head was resting on her hand, her brow was raised at the brunette while patiently waiting for an answer.

"Nothing…" Josie answered quietly, looking away from the tribrid.

"Well, it's good to finally see you outside a little bit." The shorter girl said with a cheerful grin, "How did you escape from Lizzie's party preparations? I barely managed to get outside alive." The tribrid said with a playful tone, smiling widely at the brunette.

"We fought, I needed quiet and she couldn’t give me that." Josie said dryly, ignoring the girl's attempts of making her feel better.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Hope suggested softly.

"Not really, no." the brunette rejected her help, though she did appreciate Hope's concern.

The shorter girl nodded in understanding, she wore a small smile for Josie, but her smile didn’t match her eyes, her eyes seemed sad, concerned.

"What's bothering you?" The brunette asked intrigued, walking slowly towards Hope's direction and sitting next to her.

"Just the prom." The girl said in a weak tone, her head was tilted downward

"What, don’t have a date?" Josie said sarcastically and let out a small chuckle.

Hope smiled half-heartedly and chuckled lightly, "no…" she said while her eyes were still attached to the ground.

The brunette noticed how the corners of the tribrid's lips took a different turn. Josie looked at her attentively, waiting patiently for the girl to feel comfortable enough to let it out.

She would gladly listen to Hope's problems and concerns, she did need something to distract her from her ex.

"It's Lizzie." The tribrid said hesitatingly, facing the other witch again. Her eyes were glossy, and her sad smile got more noticeable, Josie wore a confused expression, not fully understanding the undertone to those words.

Hope could see that the girl wasn’t fully comprehending the situation, but she could still see some reassurance in her big brown eyes. "I have feelings..." She said quietly, her voice was shaky and trembled. She cleared her throat, "for Lizzie." She continued, her tone was sharper than before, an ironic chuckle escaped her lips, she faced down to the floor once again out of embarrassment.

The girl's declaration caught Josie surprised, not expecting the events to take such a sharp turn.

Growing up, she always had to maneuver between Hope and Lizzie due to the fact that the two never got along, Lizzie saw the tribrid as someone who threatens her, threatens to turn all her loved ones against her, someone who took her father away from her. and Hope was just annoyed and unamused by the way Lizzie had always mistreated her.

Though, Josie did play a huge part in the tension between them. She was the blame for the wedge between her sister and Hope, she was the one who tore them apart, all for this small, secret, childhood crush she had on the tribrid.

She always felt guilty for it, for being dishonest to her sister and her friend, for being the one responsible to their rivalry.

But apparently, there was more to it under the surface, there were unsaid words between them, unseen and unheard feelings, and that just made everything a thousand times more complicated.

"That’s… not what I expected." The brunette said with her eyes wide open, "Since when?" the witch asked softly, laying her hand on Hope's shoulder, making comforting circles with her thumb, her guilt still haunting her, burning inside her chest. She is the one responsible for Hope's heartbreak, and who knows, maybe Lizzie's too?

"I don’t know, it's been quite a while…" the tribrid answered quietly.

"So what made you tell me this now?" the girl's curiosity peeked, still caressing Hope's shoulder.

"I didn’t plan on doing that…" she faltered, "You just caught me in a bad day, I guess." The short girl shrugged and waved her hands in the air dismissively.

"What happened?" the brunette asked, the tribrid could sense the big brown eyes that were looking at her attentively, patiently waiting but also slightly pressuring her into talking.

"I just… I just thought that maybe, _maybe,_ Lizzie feels the same way as I do, it's ridiculous I know." The tribrid stated hesitantly, a tear or two streamed out of her eyes, her voice cracked.

"But turns out I was completely wrong. She takes Raf as her date tonight." Hope let out a deep breath as she tries to keep her tears at bay.

Josie's gaze softened at the girl's confession, she pulled her into a tight hug and rubbed her palm against her back to calm her down, her chest still burning with heaviness, her guilt is eating her from her inside.

"Everything will get better, you'll see." She whispered. The anger and burden she felt didn’t match her own words.

She pulled out of their warm hug, "Can I tell you something?" the brunette asked softly as both of her arms were still placed on the girl's shoulders. The tribrid nodded while wiping a tear that was pouring down her cheek.

"Don’t give up just yet, go, shoot your shot, you can't know what the other side truly feels without trying." Josie said compassionately, smiling softly and reassuringly at the short girl.

"Thank you." Hope whispered, grinning slightly at the other girl's advice. The tribrid stood up and left the place, leaving Josie alone with her thoughts once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey thank you again for reading! let me know in the comments what you thought about it. i hope updating the next chapter wont take long but you might have to be patient :)


	3. Let's Hurt Tonight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the prom is finally here, the entire school is excited, except for josie. but what happens when josie sees a mysterious image at the prom?  
> also some hizzie for you guys.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys thank you so much for still reading this fic, i hope you will enjoy this chapter.

Its been hours, the sun was about to set down, the music for the Homecoming prom already started to beam loudly from the school, the music that was being played filled the entire school's territory, and the sound of young teenagers' laughter was radiating from afar.

But a certain brunette was too caught up in her own bubble to even notice her surroundings. She was trapped in her own mind, struggling to handle all her emotions at once.

She felt tortured, on one hand, her heart was broken, shattered, damaged, _bleeding, even_. And on the other hand, she felt conflicted with herself, with her actions, she was confused by the unknown answers to her questions that kept troubling her mind.

_Why did Penelope have to leave? Why did she not stay until the merge?_

_Was our past not enough of a reason for her to stay?_

_Did she ever love me?_

_Did I ruin Hope and Lizzie's one chance of being happy?_

_Am I wrong for not telling Lizzie about the merge?_

And it sure didn’t help her that every tiny thing reminded her of Penelope, and every single time she felt this sharp pinch in her heart. She thought about how she ruined everything for Lizzie and Hope, and of course that this one terrible, pressing, headache she had from all her doubts and questions wasn’t useful at all.

She was still outside at the old mill, breathing the fresh air and watching how the sun slowly dawns, and how the darkness slowly breaks into the world.

Josie loved the sunset, there was something about how the light of the day and dark of the night merging and painting the sky with pastel colors that made her feel relieved, she was drawn into it, it quelled her and her thoughts.

She found the sunset relatable, the lightness and the darkness mixing and creating something more balanced, peaceful and beautiful, and she could see herself reflecting in the sunset.

But lately all she has been feeling is darkness, all she sees is darkness, all she knows is darkness. 

* * *

Lizzie was getting ready for the prom, she was standing next to the mirror trying on different dresses, pondering each time if this would be the right one.

She tried a pink one, but she hates the color pink, she tried a red one, but she didn’t feel like it would match the theme, and then she tried another dress, this time it was a gorgeous light blue dress, with silver laced flowers decorations all over the dress, it was beautiful. The blonde looked up and down, still wondering if that’s the one dress that would impress everyone in the prom, and especially Rafael.

A slight knock on the door interrupted Lizzie, and caused her to turn around towards the door, her gaze meeting ocean eyes looking at her with amusement.

"H- hey. Sorry… for interrupting." Hope could feel the warm blood rushing towards her cheeks and making her look like a tomato.

"Oh, it's you." Lizzie rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to the dress she was wearing, adding finale touches to it. After a few moments the blonde realized the short girl was still standing next to her doorstep, not moving.

"What do you want, Hope? I'm busy if you haven’t noticed." Lizzie said nonchalantly.

"Oh, yeah." Hope shook her head immediately, not noticing how long she'd been staring at the other girl.

"I just… wanted to drop this," the tribrid walked closer to Lizzie slowly and hesitatingly, handing her a big red velvet box, "it's a gift, for the prom. I gave Josie one too." She lied, she only had one gift and it was for one special girl, but she didn’t want Lizzie to get suspicious.

The witch took the red velvet box from Hope's hands, giving it a short, confused glance and then turning her gaze to the tribrid, she frowned at the weirdly nice gesture and simply said "thanks." In return.

Hope nodded nervously and walked back to the doorstep, and right before her foot was about to leave the room, she turned around to face Lizzie once again, her eyes checking the blonde from head to toe, she was so damn _beautiful_. The tribrid felt her chest burning with desire, and warmth.

"By the way, you look stunning in this dress." The short girl said softly while meeting the blonde's beautiful light blue eyes.

The auburn-haired girl half smiled at the girl and turned on her heels to leave the room, and the taller girl felt a mix of emotions running in her heart and mind.

She opened the red velvet box and found a light blue with silver decorations masquerade mask, one that would fit perfectly to the dress she was currently wearing.   
And next to the mask there was a small note saying, _'In a world where everyone wears a mask, it's a privilege to see a soul, but I know that even with you wearing a mask, I could still see a beautiful soul in your eyes.'_

As Lizzie read Hope's note, she felt her heart softening, a small smile grew on her face without her even noticing.

* * *

The prom got closer and closer, the sun already set down and the darkness painted the sky. the students walked into the school's main hall, each one escorted by their partners or by their friends.

MG, Kaleb, Landon and Jed were in the middle of the dance floor, dancing and laughing, having the time of their lives.

Josie was hiding in the corners of the school, watching her friends laughing, singing, and dancing like a bunch of crazy people, and she envied them, she envied how they could put all their problems aside for one night, and she wanted to be able to do that as well.

Really, she would give _everything_ she could to just let go, for _one_ single night, to just laugh and dance, and forget about her expiration date. To live in the very short time she had left.

But she felt trapped, strangled, something was keeping her from doing it, something was holding her back, preventing her from doing what she _wanted_ , what she desired.

"Hey, you good?" MG approached the brunette, holding a red cup offered to her.

"Yeah, thanks." She answered dryly, forcing a small smile on her face and grabbing the drink offered to her.

"Do you want to dance? I hear they have a pretty mean playlist." The vampire offered kindly, wearing a huge toothy bright smile on his face.

"I think I would rather just stay here, thank you though." She said while taking a big swig out of her drink.

MG nodded in understanding and went forward to the dance floor, Josie followed him with her eyes, watching him get swallowed in the sea of students.

While watching MG leave, a mysterious image was caught in her sight, drawing her attention. That said image had a short raven-hair, just like Penelope's, but she couldn’t see her face because she was wearing a mask.

Josie felt a rush of hope running through her veins, her heart beating faster while she tries to move closer and closer to that girl, navigating herself through the crowded room just to get to the mysterious girl.

But when she finally made it to the destination, the image was no longer there.

* * *

The event just started, all the students were gathered in the main hall with their friends, some were dancing, some were eating in the corners of the hall, and some were just chatting with their loved ones.

It was the right time for Lizzie to make her entrance, she wasn’t _too_ late, but it was late enough to get everyone's attention on her, or in simple words, she was being fashionably late.

She was making her way into the main hall, watching everyone from above. The blonde walked down the stairs, she felt everyone's eyes on her, but her eyes searched for one person. Lizzie's eyes looked for Rafael, who was supposed to wait for her down the stairs just like she had told him to, but failed tracking him.

She suddenly felt anxious, lots of questions and doubts started to race in her mind, did he not show up? Or wait, maybe she just missed him, after all there were a lot of people at the same room, right? She might be wrong. But then the realization hit her, _he didn’t show up_ , he bailed on her.

her heart beating fast, and a thin layer of sweat appeared on her forehead, now everyone will see she got ditched by the werewolf. She continued walking down the stairs, trying to stay composed but with no success, she felt the entire school's eyes on her, judging her.

She was ready for the laughter and mocking she'll get after she'll finish walking those finale steps down, for the moment where the entire school realize that she is the popular girl who got ditched by her crush in the prom, the head-master's 'crazy' daughter who couldn’t even get a proper date.

Lizzie's mind was spiraling, her hands started to tremble slightly, her breath became heavier, she could not believe this was happening to her.

Hope watched the blonde walking down the stairs attentively, she thought she looked fantastic, she watched her as if she was the only one in the entire world. She could not hide the amusement on her face watching the blonde girl in her prom dress and the mask she gave her.

Something was wrong though, the blonde wasn’t acting like her normal self, she was smiling nervously, her eyes were flickering and running fast as if she was searching for someone desperately.

Hope noticed Rafael was missing, he ditched Lizzie in the most important night of her life. How can anyone do it to Lizzie Saltzman? The tribrid felt angry and furious about how the wolf didn’t appreciate what he had, and how he disappointed the blonde.

Hope rushed to the stairs and waited for Lizzie down below, looking at her like she is the biggest and brightest star in the sky, offering her a fondled look.

The blonde's eyes met piercing ocean blue eyes, shining through a Bordeaux masquerade mask, and she could feel her mind calming down, her breath becoming lighter, a huge smile of relief appeared on Lizzie's features as the tribrid appeared.

"Don’t worry, I got you." The tribrid whispered softly, her hand was offered for Lizzie to hold, the blonde hesitated for a single moment before taking the auburn-haired girl's hand. When their hands touched, Lizzie felt a small wave of chills making its way through her body, a sudden rush of warmth was felt coursing through her veins.

"Thank you, for this." Lizzie said softly, giving hope a small smile of gratitude.

"Anytime." The short girl answered, grinning at the sight of the blonde smiling at her.

Hope escorted Lizzie down to the direction of the dancing floor, and left her hand. The blonde couldn’t ignore the way her skin was burning and screaming, protesting the lack of touch. She also could not ignore the way Hope looked incredibly gorgeous in her maxi Bordeaux dress, with half shoulder sleeves that exposed her smooth skin and complimented her body just perfectly.

"Well, I will leave you to be with your friends." Hope said with a sad smile as she noticed Kaleb and Jed approaching Lizzie.

"Wait! Would you like to dance with me?" the blonde pleaded with big blue eyes, and a shy smile smeared on her face. For some unknown reason, all she wanted right now was to be around the tribrid's company.

It was probably because she is very thankful for what Hope did for her, right? It doesn’t have to mean anything… right?

"I mean, I feel like I owe you this at the very least, you know… after saving me from being the school's biggest joke." Lizzie continued nervously, trying to calm the thoughts in her mind.

"It's no problem, and I would love to." Hope shrugged and nodded softly with a special smile only offered to the blonde, she can't remember the last time she felt this happy. _Lizzie wants to dance with me?_ She couldn’t believe this was real.

This time it was the blonde girl who offered her hand to the other, and the tribrid took it with no hesitation. Lizzie lead her to the middle of the dance floor, both of them dancing playfully according to the beat, throwing happy smiles at each other and sneaking some glances in between, when the other wouldn’t notice.

The song changed to a slow song, suddenly all the students paired up with their escorts and started dancing slowly according to the rhythm of the song.

The two girls froze, both were hesitating a bit before making any farther move. Would this be weird if they danced to the slow song playing in the background? It probably would, they should just cut off and leave each to their own path. But none of them really wanted the moment to end.

So, they froze there, until Hope wrapped her arms around Lizzie's waist, and the blonde followed her lead and laid her hands on the tribrid's shoulders.

They were dancing slowly, barely moving if at all, their eyes never leaving each other's, sending small and soft grins at each other.

The auburn girl could feel how the palms of her hands become a little sweaty, something about this moment felt so intimate, but what if it was just her mind tricking her into having false hope? What if this meant nothing to Lizzie, and when this night is over, they'll be back to hating each other?

They were dancing while wrapping their hands around each other, but none of them dared to voice any thought they had in their mind. The entire world seemed as if it went mute, regardless of the slow music playing in the background.

The silence between them became comforting, like they could look at the other's eyes and feel calm, peace, quiet, they felt no need to speak. Their eyes were already reading each other's mind and thoughts, it was nice, it was serene.

They spent a whole minute in silence, although it felt longer than a minute, until Lizzie broke the silence and said, "You look fantastic."

Once the words had left the blonde's mouth, her eyes grew widely open, and one hand immediately leaving the tribrid's shoulder and shutting her own mouth, it was as if her mouth just betrayed her and revealed her thoughts without her consent.

Hope laughed at the way Lizzie's eyes grew to a comical size, "It's okay, I think you look fantastic too."

And before Lizzie could say anything else, the music in the background changed once again, and MG and Kaleb grabbed her to dance with them, Leaving Hope standing alone, smiling widely, feeling the butterflies dancing in her stomach.

This was definitely the best night of her life.

* * *

Josie was still wandering around in the room, not attending the fun of the party but searching the image from earlier, hoping it was the person she wanted to see.

"Hey, excuse me, have you seen someone with short curly hair walking around?" the brunette asked one of the students in the party, desperately trying to find the image she had saw earlier.

"No." the student replied dryly and left, leaving a frustrated Josie still trying to search between all the students for this girl.

The small rush of hope she felt earlier had left her body a while ago, now she just felt disappointment. But honestly what was she expecting? That Penelope would just magically appear out of the blue in the school?

Penelope left. She's gone. That’s what Josie had to keep reminding herself. But she still couldn’t avoid the way this little hope has made her heart beat faster and faster.

 _It wasn’t her, you're just seeing things_. She kept telling herself, but it didn’t help her shut off the thought of _what if_ , what if that was Penelope?

The girl kept wondering, and wandering between the different students, only so she could find an image that was probably the fruit of her imagination. Josie let out a big, and exhausted sigh, this was a bad idea, this was dumb. She's not real.

Josie started racing to the direction of her room, all she wanted right not was to lock herself up and never leave it again. She pushed through the dancing students, trying to find her path to her room.

"Oh my god! I'm so sorry, I didn’t see-" Josie bumped in with another girl, causing her to drop her drink. She immediately apologized and helped the other girl lift up the things she had dropped on the floor. Her gaze lifted and met the other girl's features, short dark and curly hair, green eyes, this was the girl from before, the image she was looking for. But it wasn’t Penelope.

"It's okay, don’t worry." The image from before replied, sending a dry smile to the brunette and continuing in her way.

 _It wasn’t Penelope_.

Josie could feel her heart dropping down from her chest, the feeling of disappointment sitting heavily on her. She was upset, her heart tricked her into believing this could be real. That she could see Penelope again, that she could hear her voice again, touch her again. But it wasn’t her.

The brunette left the prom, and rushed into her room eagerly. All she wanted was to be alone right now, she should’ve never left her room in the first place.

She crawled into her bed, a few tears that managed to escape were pouring down her cheeks, she hated how miserable she felt, she hated how badly the burden of all of her feelings was weighing on her.

Josie found herself grabbing her phone and scrolling through her contacts. She froze, her eyes were fixated on the bright screen, hesitating whether or not she should do it. Her fingers were hovering above the contact 'Penelope', her heart was screaming on her to do it, but her mind was protesting.

This would be a bad idea.

**_Dialing 'Penelope'…_ **

Suddenly displayed on her phone screen, her fingers betrayed her mind and its orders, she felt her heart beating and jumping when she heard the first beep, her fingers trembled harshly, her breath was taken away, it felt like her body forgot how to breathe. She couldn’t believe she was doing this, this was terrible, what was she thinking?

Another beep passed, and another… she was losing hope by the increasing seconds. She felt how the disappointment was about to take over her, she felt embarrassed for believing anything good could come out of this phone call. She wanted to hang up quickly before the other girl would have the chance to answer her call, but her body refused to do so, she couldn’t bring her fingers to push the big red button.

Suddenly the dial tone stopped, Josie could hear someone pick the phone from the other side of the line.

"Hello?" she suddenly heard a weak and raspy voice in the opposite line. A wave of chills found its way down her body, her lips parted when she recognized the other girl's voice, it was different, but it was still familiar. Josie knew it was Penelope's voice, but something about it was so unusual and unknown, she just couldn’t put her finger on it.

"Josie?" the girl said from the other line after a few beats of silence, her tone was insecure, confused, concerned even. Her name rolled on the other girl's tongue so quickly and easily, as if that name had never left the raven-haired girl's mouth, or thoughts.

Josie wanted to stay in silence, to not let a single word out of her mouth, it felt easier this way. All she wanted was to sit and listen to the other girl's voice, a voice she missed hearing so much. But she knew she couldn’t, she had to say something, she felt like she owed that much to Penelope.

She tried with all of her will power to say something, but nothing came out. Her throat was throbbing with pain because of how uncapable she was of putting her thoughts into words when it came to the witch. She felt her tears starting to gather together to try and break out of her eyes, but Josie fought back, she fought back her tears with all the energy she had left. 

The brunette tried to speak again, she tried so hard, but all that came out was a small and weak shaky breath.

"Jojo…" Josie heard the raven-haired sighing heavily into the phone while softly pronouncing that special nickname. The hearing of the familiar nickname made Josie's heart burn with sharp pain, and without her noticing, another shaky breath left her lungs.

"Are you okay? Did something happen?" the girl was so quick to ask, her tone was concerned, like it was expecting from someone to break out the worst news to her.

Josie could not see Penelope, but she could imagine the exact facial expression she was probably currently wearing. She could just picture Penelope's eyebrows frown with deep concern, her lips being apart of each other, and her eyes shining with that bright spark they always have, but this time all they radiate is fear and horror.

She didn’t have to see Penelope eye to eye to know how she would react, especially when it came to her. Just like she didn’t have to be near Penelope to know that something was wrong, her voice was not the same as she remembered, something was definitely not right.

Josie let out the huge breath she was holding hostage to the air, assuring the other girl that she's still on the other line listening to her.

"I'm okay." She slowly let out, she could never imagine how hard it would be to just put out two words together. Another shaky breath escaped her mouth, probably the 1000th, and a single tear fell down on her cheek, this was terrible.

"Oh, thank god." The girl said weakly and let out a huge sigh of relief, and Josie could just feel the rock that was being lifted up from Penelope's heart.

Silence fell between them again, they could hear each other's breaths through the phone, and they both listened carefully, listening like the most beautiful music was being played on the other side of the line.

Josie could hear how the raven-haired girl's breath was heavier, each breath she took felt sharper, it sounded like she was struggling to breathe, and once in a while she let one big shaky breath filled with agony and ache. Something felt wrong, the brunette could sense how the girl's breath was unstable, unsettle, weak.

"I… missed you." The brunette whispered so quietly into the phone, almost so quiet that Penelope could barely hear it. Her tone was insecure, stuttered and hesitant. She sniffled and wiped away the tears that were pouring down her face. She felt her mind screaming at her for not thinking all of this through.

The silence took over the line once again, and Josie wanted to hit her head in a wall for saying this, she probably scared the other girl away. She felt so dumb and embarrassed, she wanted to take it back.

"I missed you too." The emerald-eyed girl whispered back softly, almost as quietly as Josie.

Josie was relieved, she felt like the 5 seconds of silence were lasting for an eternity. She could hear the slight smile that appeared on Penelope's face through the phone, and it caused her to smile slightly as well, and caused her heart dance inside her chest.

* * *

Penelope was lying on the cold floor, shattered glass was everywhere around her, the smell of smoke filled the entire place, and a puddle of blood was pouring right next to her weak body.

Blood, it was everywhere, on the walls, on the windows, and on the floor. It covered Penelope's body, but she wasn’t sure if she was covered in her own blood.

She felt deep pain in her rib, she must've broken it when her body was thrown at the wall from across the room. She felt a sharp pinch in the left side of her stomach, she tried to lift up her head a little to see the injury, but she couldn’t. She felt excruciating pain, it was unbearable.

Her eyes started to fill with dark clouds, covering her vision, she could feel her body giving up slowly, her mind was protesting, yelling, telling her to stay awake, to fight, but it was failing.

She could feel herself slowly losing her conscious, the pain suddenly felt dull, almost nonexistent. Her body was relaxing its muscles, letting all the pain go, her thoughts slowed down just like her heartbeat did, and her breath became shallower as time passed.

Suddenly a sharp and loud sound rang in her ears, her phone went off, and she felt how the sound was waking her mind and senses up.

for a single second the dark clouds faded, and the raven-haired girl looked directly towards her phone that was lying on the floor one feet away from her.

Her sight was blurry, but she could see exactly whose name was displaying on her phone screen.

**_'Jojo'_ **

Her heart ignored the pain her body was in and started beating faster with the increasing moment. Penelope's mind was racing, flashing the details of Josie's face, her smile, her eyes, her cute nose. All the small and significant details that Penelope could never forget.

Her body was waking itself up, the pain gradually became sharper, more agonizing and sorer, but the raven-haired girl ignored it and crawled on the cold floor, just to get to her phone. Every tiny movement caused her to flinch with burning pain, her jaw was clenched tightly so the sounds of screaming won't escape her mouth.

She finally reached the phone and answered the call, she was terrified that something bad happened to Josie, she felt her mind going into a hysterical state. Her body was severely injured and in raging pain, but all she could care about was Josie's well-being.

She called the brunette's name with panic, her voice was weak, raspy, shaky. She tried to cover up the fact that she was currently hurting, badly. She didn’t have to fight against her body to call out Josie's name, it was the only thing that rolled off her tongue so easily, always have been and always will be.

She got no respond, the silence in the line was deafening.

Penelope could feel her body giving up all over again, the dark clouds took over, again. She felt her breath slowing down, again, all of her senses becoming numb, again.

She couldn’t give up, not now, not yet, she knew Josie was on the other line, probably not sure what she should say. The raven-haired girl knew the brunette better than anyone, and she knew she had to lead the conversation.

All of a sudden, she could hear a weak small breath on the other line, and her heart jumped back and forth in circles. It was Josie.

"Jojo…" Penelope sighed heavily, her pain still stinging. She could hear the other girl reacting to the special nickname with a deep hurting sigh, one that made Penelope's heart cry with pain.

"Are you okay? Did something happen?" the raven-haired girl quickly asked with panic all over her voice. Her expression filled with fright and horror, fearing she's about to get the worst news ever.

Silence took over, again, but Penelope could hear Josie's shaky breath on the opposite line, she could hear her whipping and wheezing, also trembling. Something was troubling the brunette's mind, upsetting her, making her feel unsettled.

"I'm okay." The brunette said weakly, finally putting an end to the painful silence between them. The shorter girl felt a huge rock lifting off her heart, she felt relieved, her worries and concerns washing away along with the blood from her body.

"I… missed you." Penelope could barely hear what the other girl said because of her quiet tone, she wasn’t even sure if she imagined her saying that or if that was real. But she didn’t care, even if it was just a fruit of her imagination.

The witch felt her eyes watering at the thought of this announcement. She squeezed her eyes harshly in an attempt to stop the tears from breaking through, she felt her heart softening but also aching sharply at the very same time. Her breath was still painful, burning her throat like fire. She took a moment to let those words ring in her brain, she felt like she was hallucinating.

"I missed you too." The girl let out as weakly and as quietly as Josie did, her tears broke through and poured down with no control. Her body was still in pain, but her mind stopped protesting against it.

She felt herself relaxing and giving into the pain while listening to Josie's shaky breaths on the line.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you liked reading this one, i enjoyed writing it very much.   
> i still havent started writing chapter 4 meaning you guys might gonna have to wait a little longer for an update... sorry about that.  
> also i really dont know if you guys even like what i write or not because you dont comment so i honestly cant tell, and im not going to lie that it kinda sucks to spend months writing and not get a feedback, positive or negative... so i would really appreciate it if you guys let me know your honest opinion about this fic so far.
> 
> anyway i'll see you next time


	4. Baby Can You Hear Me Screaming?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Penelope is still injured, her body is numb but her mind wont stop wondering. Lizzie and Josie being the soft sisters we deserve, and a little bit about Penelope's background. let me know if you like it!

Deafening high-pitched noise.

And then nothing.

That was the first – or last – thing Penelope heard.

She felt nothing.

The unsettling pain she remembered feeling earlier was gone completely.

Her lungs weren’t burning her insides like acid, her ribcage wasn’t aching, the sharp pain around her stomach was gone, her head wasn’t throbbing with agony, nothing hurt her anymore, nothing was felt anymore.

She wasn’t entirely sure if she could even feel her own heartbeat.

She tried to open her eyes, but all she saw was black.

Did she even manage to open her eyes? She couldn’t tell.

The high-pitched noise came back, ringing painfully and loudly in her ears, and then disappearing.

If she could feel her heartbeat, she would feel it racing quickly, harshly, panickily. Like it was threatening to jump out of her body and run away.

She felt her blood rushing to her ears, like a large wave in the middle of the ocean, rocking and tilting the water, bringing unknown treasures with it. The warm blood flooding around her ears created a precise replica of the beach's soundtrack, of waves crashing harshly onto the sand, of strong warm wind blowing in her face, it reminded her of the summer.

Summer was not Penelope's favorite season in the year, but she did appreciate the warmth and light that came with it, she loved that summer meant walking barefoot on the beach, feeling the warm sand caressing her feet and feeling the cold water kissing her skin, and she loved that summer meant freedom.

Her mind was tricked into thinking that was her surrounding, and Penelope could feel it relaxing to the false sensation of the wind and the waves, and of the freedom.

But then she remembered the scenes from before, the men in the black masks, Caroline disappearing, her injuries, the broken glass, the blood. She remembered the cold floor and her skin shivering at the contact of the cold metal. She remembered the scorching smell of smoke filling her nostrils, and then, the loud ring of her phone.

Josie.

She was talking with Josie, listening to her sweet and soft voice, a voice she'd spent days and nights missing and thinking about, desiring to hear once again. She remembered paying attention to the girl's shaky breaths, feeling the pain Josie felt, a pain she was probably the cause of. She remembered feeling her heart filling with warmth, with love, even when her entire body was screaming for help.

And even now, when her body is crying to get its sensation back, to feel alive once again, her heart still warms up just at the thought of Josie.

A voice in the background interrupted Penelope's thoughts, she could barely hear it, it sounded so far away, like it was coming from the other side of the world, yet so loud. But she couldn’t understand where it was coming from or whose voice was it and she couldn’t understand what the voice was trying to say.

She heard it again, and again, each time it felt a little bit closer, like the person who was calling from afar was getting closer and closer. Or maybe they were always nearby?

"Hey! Wake up!" Gradually the voice sounded clearer and closer to her, but she couldn’t recognize it. Her hearing came back to full function. She felt the blood that blocked her hearing swimming away, the sensation was similar to the sensation you'd get when your head is being pulled out of the water after a long time of being underneath them, and now she could finally hear everything, with no blockage.

The person kept nudging her and pleading her to open her eyes, but nothing seemed to make Penelope physically react.

Penelope heard the person, she wanted so badly to open her eyes and see who was the stranger who was calling for her, but nothing happened, her body refused to react and her senses refused to work, she was paralyzed, she couldn’t do anything and everything was still dark, nothing was caught in her sight.

She wished she could feel the pain and the coldness she felt earlier, anything really, anything to feel alive again, but nothing came.

"Ma'am please!" The stranger kept yelling and shooting orders, begging and pleading Penelope to do something, anything.

And it tore Penelope's heart apart to know that there was nothing she could do, she was helpless and hopeless. She didn’t understand what was happening around her, she couldn’t remember exactly where she was, she couldn’t see anything, she couldn’t feel anything, she couldn’t speak, she couldn’t breathe, she couldn’t move, she couldn’t even blink.

Her mind seemed to be the only thing that still works, because it hadn’t stopped racing with questions, questions that Penelope didn’t have the answer to, and probably will never have them either.

* * *

"Penelope, can you hear me?" a dimmed and fuzzy voice was talking to her, once again a voice she did not recognize.

She opened her eyes, and there was a bright light directed at her eye. She could see, blurry and hazy, but it was something. The blurriness slowly faded, and she could finally perceive the face of the person who was talking to her, and her surroundings.

She looked to her right and to her left and was encountered with medical machines and equipment, two nurses, one doctor, and one Caroline.

She was in the Hospital.

"What happened?" She quickly asked, trying to sit up on the uncomfortable hospital bed, but was stopped when a burning pinch prevented her from doing so, a pinch that caused Penelope to flinch with pain.

"Miss Park! I'm glad to see we have you back, how are you feeling?" The doctor smiled at the girl and asked nicely while checking her heartrate and blood pressure.

Penelope was still a little bit hazy and not completely comprehending what had happened, but she just smiled back politely at the doctor and simply said "I'm okay."

"Great, everything seems good, your heartrate and blood pressure are finally back to normal." The doctor said while observing Penelope's file.

"Now, do you remember what happened to you?" the doctor continued, his full attention is directed to Penelope now.

Penelope felt everything coming back to her like acid flashbacks. She was looking for another lead with Caroline at an old abandoned apartment who used to belong to a witch from the Gemini coven, they were hoping she would be able to give them more information about the curse, but when they arrived no living person was there.

She remembered walking slowly and carefully at the old apartment, observing every single detail, just in case the witch left anything behind that could help them with their research. The girl really hoped that this would lead them to somewhere, actually she didn’t hope, she expected it, but she should’ve known better.

But what she sure did not expect was to be startled by three men who wore black masks to cover their faces.

She remembered how the men shattered the windows and broke into the apartment, one of them was rushing to ignite the old bookcase, and the rest of them surrounded Penelope, trapped her.

She remembered how Caroline screamed from behind Penelope and tried to warn her when one of them came too close to her, but it ended up with Penelope being too distracted by the blonde's loud yell to notice that the man was aiming a large knife at her, and without realizing it, he stabbed her.

She remembered gasping once she felt the cold iron make a cut through her skin and penetrating it. She remembered the wave of shock that washed over her body, the sharp pain that came along with it, and the burning sensation around the area of the wound. She remembered how she fell onto the floor once she couldn’t handle the pain any longer, and how her blood quickly created a puddle around her.

She remembered how the men ran away in a beat after they injured her, and she remembered seeing Caroline disappearing quickly afterwards thanks to her vamp-speed.

She remembered it all.

"No, not really." she said in a bit cold tone, her face was fixated on a random spot on the floor, she just couldn’t bring herself to look at the doctor and lie right through her teeth.

"Why am I here?" the raven-haired girl lifted her gaze back to the doctor, her expression was baffled and confused, she needed answers to all of her non-stopping questions that kept troubling her mind.

"You were found with a stab wound in your abdomen. You were severely injured, you suffered from internal bleeding around your stomach and you lost a large amount of blood. When you arrived here with the person who found you, you were completely unconscious. We rushed you into surgery to stop the bleeding and take care of your internal injuries, but during the surgery we had to resuscitate you once, thankfully we had luck." The information left the doctor's mouth as quickly as water pouring out of a bottle.

The raven-haired girl tried to process all this information at once, but she couldn’t fully process that she was one foot in her own grave, she couldn’t fully understand that she almost wasn’t able to experience breathing ever again, and she couldn’t fully comprehend that she almost failed Josie.

Her expression went dark at the second Josie's name popped into her mind. She almost failed her, she almost died without being close to finding a cure that would save Josie's life. She almost joined the long list of people who had left Josie.

She knew that she had already joined that list the second her foot left the ground of the Salvatore School, but she didn’t plan on staying on that list permanently. Deep down she always knew one day she'll be back, hopefully with a cure, and will reunite with Josie. Deep down she knew one day everything will be fine, she had hope.

"Resuscitate?" The girl furrowed her brows with concern, her eyes became glossy as she looked at the doctor and her bottom lip slightly trembled.

The doctor simply nodded at her question and put his hand on Penelope's shoulder as a gesture to calm her down and reassure her that everything was fine while offering her a kind smile.

"You can be calm, you're okay now, we managed to finish the surgery with no further complications. We are going to come back later to run some more check-ups but until then you should rest a little bit." The doctor offered and walked out of the room along with the two nurses who were standing behind him and observing Penelope.

Penelope let out a huge exhale and felt her eyes darting around the small hospital room, searching for a place to hide from the world, from all of her problems, she needed an escape from this cruel reality, but she was interrupted by Caroline who took a chair and sat next to the girl's bed.

The blonde patiently waited for Penelope to look at her face, to stop trying to avoid the elephant in the room, and she patiently watched the girl looking at every corner of the room, anywhere besides at her.

"Look at me." Caroline demanded, her patience had struck its limit.

Penelope refused to look at her and fought the urge of rolling her eyes at the blonde's demanding tone.

"You almost died on me." The vampire said calmly and sadly, her lips tightened and turned into a sad smile as the words rolled off her tongue and the realization hit her.

Penelope finally looked to the blonde's direction and copied her facial expression, tight lipped smile and sad eyes.

She felt her eyes glistering with emotion once again and quickly turned her gaze away from the vampire, last thing she needed right now was for Caroline to see her crying.

The vampire saw the girl trying to avoid and to hide from her once again, and took her hand in hers and rubbed comforting circles against her palm.

"I'm so sorry." She let out heavily, along with a small sob that threatened to escape for a while.

Penelope heard the blonde's sob and turned back her gaze to Caroline's direction, seeing her like that made her feel worse, feel like she almost failed another person but Josie, and God, she wishes she could control her feelings better, to be more composed and tough as she was always used to be, but she failed and her eyes were pouring with water seconds later.

She wanted to tell Caroline that this wasn’t her fault, but she feels like that would be a lie, because in some sort of a sick and twisted way, it was, because Caroline left her there, all alone, and Penelope still doesn’t know the reason to why she did.

She wanted to be straight ahead and confront Caroline for the reason she had disappeared in the scene where everything wrong, but she bit her tongue, this wasn’t the right time, not when the blonde was sobbing and smearing her tears all over Penelope's hospital bed.

So, she simply put her second hand above Caroline's and smiled at her while tears kept washing her cheeks, and without saying another word.

* * *

"Morning sleepy head." Lizzie walked into the room holding a tray that contains two plates with French toasts, strawberries and one maple syrup for both her and Josie.

Josie slowly sat up on her bed, her head hurting like sledgehammers knocking on her brain, her hair was all over her face and her eyes were slightly red and puffy.

"What is this?" Josie asked with a husky voice, her throat was dry and tired.

"I wanted to apologize, about everything lately, and I thought that this would be a nice gesture." Lizzie explained easily while waving her hands in the air and sitting next to Josie on her bed.

"You seem like you slept great." Lizzie noted sarcastically, referring to Josie's messy hair and her red eyes.

"Yeah…" Josie simply answered and ran a hand over her hair, trying to fix whatever mess it was in. "And you seem pretty… cheerful… what happened?" Josie said while raising her brows at her sister's large toothy smile.

"Nothing!" The blonde attempted on hiding her nervousness, but with no success.

"Okay… are you sure?" Josie asked again with a confused tone.

"I just can't stop thinking about the prom." Lizzie confessed, still wearing a huge nervous smile on her face.

"About hope?" the brunette offered suggestively, slightly smirking at the sight of her sister's cheeks turning pink.

"H-how did you…" Lizzie's eyes grew wide as her blood burned the insides of her cheeks.

"Everyone saw you at the prom with her, Lizzie." Josie answered pointedly, as if that was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Uhm so, anyway…" The blonde cleared her throat and rushed to change the subject. "Since we are starting off a new leaf, wanna tell me why your eyes are all red?" The blonde asked between bites, gesturing to her sister's eyes with her hands.

The brunette froze for a moment, regaining the events from the night before, from the homecoming prom, from her conversation with Hope at the old mill, from her phone call with Penelope.

"It's just… I've been dealing with a lot lately." The girl shrugged and her eyes were attached to the floor, she knew that looking at her sister would break her into tears too easily.

The room filled with silence and Josie could feel her sister's eyes on her, patiently waiting for her to share what she'd been going through.

She let out a heavy sigh and continued, "Penelope leaving… it hit me harder than I thought it would." Her voice was broken and trembled, and a single tear fell down to the floor.

"And… last night, I felt suffocated, everything was too much to handle and I just…" The brunette stopped there, her throat was sore, she felt the flood of tears that kept dripping non-stop off her eyes down to her throat suffocating her.

"I acted on impulse, and called her." She cleared her throat and finished the sentence. She wanted so badly to hide, she wasn’t ready to hear what Lizzie had to comment about Josie calling her number one nemesis.

But to her surprise the blonde put her arm around her shoulder and held her tightly. "Jo, you know you can always come to me when you are feeling overwhelmed. You’ve done that for me so many times I've lost count…" Lizzie said softly, her eyes filled with concern and affection, and the brunette felt relieved, content that she could rely on the person she cares about the most in the world.

"So, what did Satan had to say?" Lizzie tried, but of course she would never hold back and miss an opportunity of voicing a snark against Penelope Park.

Josie let out a small chuckle at her sister's failed attempts to hold it back, it was nice to at least see her trying.

"She said she missed me…" Josie exhaled those words and felt the heaviness of her heart growing more evident clear in her chest.

"But something was wrong, her voice wasn’t the same, she sounded in pain, and I can't help myself but thinking what if something happened to her?" The brunette continued, concern washing her features, her lips trembling harder than before.

"I think you're reading into it too much, Jo. I'm sure that Vold- sorry, the one who shall not be named, is fine. Who knows maybe she finally grew a heart?" The blonde shrugged sarcastically, once again incapable of holding back.

"Don’t worry yourself with that, Jo, take a few breaths and try to distract yourself with other things." Lizzie offered while smiling at her twin and taking another bite from her breakfast. "Also eat your damn breakfast." She was ordering now.

Josie genuinely smiled at her sister and chuckled at how ridiculous she was acting, and took the plate that was meant for her.

"Thank you, Lizzie. It helped." She said softly and her eyes lit with something different, happiness maybe?

* * *

Penelope woke up screaming in the middle of the night, the time was something about 3am-ish and Caroline was sleeping tight on the couch next to Penelope's hospital bed.

She woke up with a layer of cold sweat covering her skin, and a horrified expression on her face. Her chest was heaving, she was panting, her breathing came out as shallow and rushed. She had another nightmare, the same dream she had a week ago.

It was the same dream where she sees her mother, and an image of someone who is supposedly her father. They were fighting each other, yelling, shouting, and even physically throwing fit, and then they were both slowly fading away, whatever that was remained of them suddenly was merging into one piece, but the darkness was consuming it all, even the remaining, eating their whole alive, and burning with them within it right after.

That dream terrified Penelope, but she also didn’t give it an importance or a big significance, after all she assumed it was because she had never met her father, and the dream was just presenting how she felt about him.

According to her mother's stories he was a special man, wise, curious, charming, and ambitious, but also a coward who ran away once he learned her mother was carrying his child.

She never really talks about him, never spared any extra detail about him, she always avoided mentioning his name too.

Penelope supposed it was because her mother's story with him burned her deep and fast, and now all that is left from their story is the ashes. Penelope understood it, she understood things a 17 years old girl should not understand, and because of that she never mentioned him unless it was necessary, which often it wasn’t.

If she would gather all the information she knew about her father, it would be his first name, Francis, and that he was a warlock as well as her mother and her. And that was enough for her, or at least that was what she made herself believe that was enough for her.

She never knew how he even looked like, she used to imagine it a lot as a little kid, she spent days and nights as a child drawing different images of a man, a man who is supposed to be her father, especially when her mother used to tell her that she inherited his eyes, and his hair, and his curiosity and charm.

She spent her entire childhood wondering what it would be like, to have a present father, to have another strong authority that would be there to teach her lessons for life, what it would be like to have a father picking her up from the school and taking her to eat ice cream, or what it would be like to have a father that would be so proud of the witch that she had become.

But alas, it was all just a fantasy.

She never had the opportunity to experience those things, and she spent her entire life resenting her father for stealing that from her, from not giving her a choice, from leaving a huge hole in her heart and brain, a hole she would never be able to fill.

But it was okay, most of the time. Her mother took care of her, although her mother wasn’t always the most affectionate and loving person, but she did care for her, and she did give her everything that she ever needed, and Penelope did appreciate her for that.

Penelope tried to calm herself down after her overwhelming dream, she took deep breaths and tried to force her mind to forget about it, she took another deep breath and got up slowly to wash her face in the small restroom attached to her hospital room.

She opened the tap and watched the water flowing into the sink for a little while before moving her face down to the water to wash her skin.

She felt the cold water waking up all of her senses, and making the tiredness go away for a slight moment.

She looked back to the mirror that was attached to the wall and saw her reflection, but honestly all she could see was horror, fear, and despair.

"Hey, are you okay?" Caroline startled the raven-haired girl and caused her to jump. Her tone was sleepy, and her eyes were barely open, probably dazzled by the strong light.

"Gosh! Caroline! You can't do this kind of things in the middle of the night!" Penelope shouted as she jumped by the blonde's startle.

"Sorry! I just heard you waking up and thought I would check up on you." The blonde gritted her teeth and said apologetically.

Penelope nodded understandingly and walked past the vampire back to her bed.

"We should get back to sleep." The raven-haired girl's tone was cold and serious, her expression completely empty.

Something in Caroline's stomach flipped as she saw the deadly cold expression all over the girl's face, was it fear? Was it anxiety? She couldn’t tell.

"Hey! Talk to me… why are you acting like this?" Caroline grabbed Penelope's wrist, completely not understanding what has got into the girl.

"Like what?" Penelope rolled her eyes and raised her tone a little bit, she was really not in the mood for whatever that was.

"What happened?" The vampire asked softly, her eyes looking directly into the girl's soul.

"I have a better question, where did you go?" Penelope bit back, her tone was aggressive, and her jaw was clenched, and Caroline could feel the girl staring her down.

"What are you talking about?" Her position and tone were defensive, ready to protect herself from whatever Penelope was planning on shooting towards her.

"Where did you go when I got hurt?" The girl was direct, her words came out loud and clear, but she could not hide the disappointment and hurt behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey so sorry for taking this long to update, i just wasnt at home for 3 weeks and then i got back and tried to rush this chapter and finish it in a few days so it might not be the best, but let me know what you think about the story so far, do you like the way im writing the characters? do you think i should add anything or pay more attention to anything? just let me know in the comments i would appreciate it very much!  
> anyway i hope you enjoyed reading and i hope that it wont take me too long to update again♥ anyways stay safe and healthy!


	5. Let's Burn Up The Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this one is basically a filler, its a flashback to how posie became a thing, you dont have to read it if you dont want to but i would appreciate it if you did♥

_"Pen, you need to stop! If dad will find out he's going to kill us." The brunette said dramatically while laughing uncontrollably, completely amused by the emerald-eyed girl's actions._

_"And since when do I fear from your father?" Penelope retorted with pride and a smug smirk dancing on her lips, "Besides, we are only doing our homework." She reasoned while trying to hold in the laugh that was threatening to escape her throat._

_Josie kept glaring at the girl with joy and delight clear in her eyes, her friend was truly something else. She admired how bold she was and how nothing feared her, not even a challenge. She admired her confidence and her ambition, she admired how every word that rolled off her tongue was so well thought and calculated. She admired how this one girl always left her completely speechless._

_She watched as the girl was lifting her hands to the air, once again trying to cast a spell on the group of vampires who were playing football in the yard._

_"Phesmatos is lucas odoray." Penelope chanted the spell smoothly while moving her hands in a perfect sync to the spell's rhythm, and Josie watched how a stink spell was now aimed at the group of vampires, causing them all to flinch with disgust due to the horrible, obnoxious smell._

_The raven-haired girl grinned largely at the success of her prank, her pride took over her body and her face turned red almost immediately as a result of trying to not burst into loud cackles._

_"Stop it!" The brunette hit the girl's shoulder while sending a big toothy smile to her path, causing the other witch roll on the grass with the same laughter Josie had before._

_And Josie just sat there, smiling widely as she watched her friend bursting out of laughter while rolling on the grass like a child, and something about this moment felt different to Josie, something about that made her heart dance in her chest, while butterflies kept flying in her stomach. She felt in awe, admiring the image of her friend laughing with no control, with no boundary, without her façade._

_She was in awe to how her eyes were sparkling with joy, how the sun kissed her emerald eyes just right and caused her golden flecks to pop harder than normal. She was in awe to how her skin shone in the sunlight, and how perfectly smooth it seemed, pleading for the brunette's fingertips to feel, to gently brush over, to caress it tenderly, and Josie could feel her fingertips tingling, desiring to obey._

_'That's enough, Josette, control yourself.' Her mind yelled at her heart, and her logic tried to take over her emotions._

_She tried to shook off the feeling, to repress her emotions and thoughts to the back of her mind, but she couldn’t ignore how everything that the other girl did stirred something inside her, not that she understood what it was, or maybe she did but wasn’t ready to acknowledge it completely, but she knew that whatever that was, it wasn’t going to end up well._

_"JoJo? Hello… earth to Josie Saltzman." Penelope was motioning circles with her hand close to Josie's face, causing the brunette to jump with surprise._

_Josie felt her cheeks burning red, the raven-haired girl was now really close to her face, and Josie's eyes scanned the girl's face, trying to memorize every tiny detail, every tiny scar, every tiny glimpse of skin, and God, she did not like how flustered that made her feel._

_"Hey, you good? You totally disappeared on me." Penelope still wore her smug smile, probably due to noticing how red the other girl turned to be, and it might have to do with the fact that she got closer._

_"What? No! Sorry, I was just… thinking." The brunette's voice was hesitant, but she quickly wore a large smile to hide her nervousness, at least she attempted to._

_"What about?" Penelope asked with a low voice, wiggling her brows at Josie and smirking that annoying, signature smirk of her._

_"About…" Josie's eyes grew wide and her mind was now spiraling, how was she going to save herself now? She obviously couldn’t tell her friend that she was thinking about how beautifully her eyes shone in the sunlight, or how beautiful her dark locks looked today, or how the sun flattered her skin just perfectly, or how her lips reminded her the shape of a heart, or how-_

_"About?" Penelope interrupted Josie's thoughts after a few moments of waiting for a response._

_"This." Josie said as she quickly took one of her hands close to her mouth and blew it to the other direction, watching as the air she just exhaled from her lungs was forming into hot flames, accidentally burning a small tree at the old mill._

_Josie's face washed with shame as she realized what she had just done, and the guilt for burning that cute little tree came quickly along with it, it wasn’t its fault that Josie was a complete mess when it came to her friend._

_"Damn!" Penelope let out loudly, completely impressed by what just happened, and Josie forgot completely about the guilt she felt a few moments ago. She turned around to meet Penelope's gaze only to find amusement crystal clear in her tone and her face, "That was hot." The raven-haired girl continued, still surprised by the brunette's sudden move._

_'That was hot.' Those three words echoed in Josie's brain, her friend just called her hot. Did Penelope Park, just called Josie Saltzman, hot?_

_No, she did not freak out, absolutely not, those words made her feel nothing, not even a single tiny bit of emotion, no. She just wasn’t sure if she heard right._

_"Poor tree though…" Penelope playfully whined as she scrunched her nose, and once again the brunette felt distracted by how cute that nose scrunch was._

_Josie giggled at the witch's reaction and sighed happily. "Are you coming to MG's party tomorrow?" the brunette asked, glaring at the raven-haired girl._

_"It depends, will you be there?" Penelope answered while raising her brows playfully and suggestively._

_"Lizzie wants to go, meaning I have to go too." The brunette explained softly, but her eyes were radiating a different emotion. She watched her friend attentively and saw how her expression changed as well, and Josie could've sworn she saw a slight disappointment featuring on her face._

_"Okay." Penelope nodded as her lips curled into a thin line, trying to hide her disappointment. "Then I'd be there too." She said as she tried to force a smile on her face._

_The two girls kept sitting on the grass, the silence filled them, and Josie felt the atmosphere around them changing completely and suffocating her, growing more tense by the second, and she really wished she wasn’t the reason for the sudden turn of events._

* * *

_"Jo, which dress makes my eyes pop harder?" Lizzie walked forward Josie while holding two dresses in each hand, "This one…" She gestured to a silk short deep green dress and moved it closer to her body, "Or this one." The other dress was a short light blue sequin dress._

_Josie examined both options, she liked the green one better because it was calm and simple but also beautiful, but she also knew that wasn’t Lizzie._

_"The second one." She had decided, this one would fit Lizzie better than the green one, it was also the same color as her twin's eyes, so it fit perfectly._

_Lizzie nodded and immediately tried the chosen dress on. "And what are you going to wear?" The blonde asked as she saw Josie wasn’t rummaging through her closet to find a fitting outfit._

_"I haven’t decided." The brunette answered quietly, preparing herself for Lizzie's preaching about not getting ready for this party._

_"Really, Jo? The party starts soon and you're not even close to be ready." The blonde slightly scolded and sighed heavily, she really did not want to be late to the party, at least not more than necessary._

_"It's okay, I'll find something don’t worry." Josie assured to her sister, smiling gently at the blonde so she would know everything is under control. She really did not want to disappoint another person._

_"Here take this, I think it will do you justice." Lizzie said as she threw a short yellow dress to Josie, she knew her sister would love her choice mostly because of the color._

_"Thank you." The brunette said softly, examining the dress she was handed and happily grabbing it from the blonde's hands, she loved it._

_When they got to the party, they've already tracked MG in the middle of the dance floor, dancing with his friends and classmates, and Lizzie was quick to move forward to the dance floor to steal his spotlight. Josie stood at the entrance, searching through the room and scanning every corner of it, intending to find a raven-haired with emerald eyes girl, and then there she was._

_Josie spotted her dark locks and knew in a heartbeat that this was Penelope, and as always, she looked stunning. She was wearing a tight black leather pants and a black blouse that exposed her shoulders, along with red high heels and a navy-blue bowtie. And as she moved closer, she found Penelope chatting with no other than Hope Mikaelson._

_What was Hope even doing there? She usually did not like to hang around in social events, especially not crowded parties, which completely confused Josie._

_Who would’ve thought that she would find the girl she used to crush on two years ago chatting with the girl she is cru-, well, the girl who is her friend, in this party? But something about this rare scenario stirred something inside Josie, something she did not like, but also something that was familiar to her._

_Jealousy._

_No, this wasn’t jealousy, why would she be jealous of Ho-, No, Penelope, if she got over that crush long time ago? That couldn’t be the reason for the familiar feeling._

_She saw both of the girls laughing loudly, and dancing and swaying their bodies according to the rhythm of the song playing in the background, and she watched how they got closer as they danced, how suddenly Penelope's arms found their way around Hope's waist and how the tribrid followed suit and wrapped her arms around the back of Penelope's neck, and Josie did not like what she saw, well, not liking it was an understatement._

_She stood there and simply watched, feeling her blood boiling her inside and frying her heart. She clenched her fists out of rage and if she could she would burn Hope's, no, Penelope's hair, right there. But she couldn’t. And she hated how Penelope did not pay attention to the brunette standing there with the biggest pout in the world. She hated how the witch didn’t even do as much as looking to her direction._

_She ran away from that spot, rushing to get outside and breathe in some fresh air, and as she was running the tears were forming in her eyes. She really did not understand why she was feeling like that, she didn’t feel anything for the tribrid anymore, nothing but pure friendship, so there is no way this has anything to do with her._

_Did it have anything to do with the fact that Penelope didn’t even spare her a single glance the entire time? No, it couldn’t have been, right? It wouldn’t make sense, Penelope is simply her friend, just that, her friend, nothing more._

_But what if she wanted it to be more? Would it really be that bad?_

_Yes._

_She knew she couldn’t fall for this, not this time. Penelope Park was her friend, and she obviously didn’t see Josie that way, not now and not ever, but that was okay because Josie herself wasn’t sure how she sees the raven-haired girl._

_Or, she was trying to deny what she really felt, but she would never admit it, not even to herself._

_She hated herself for being this emotional mess, for crying over… she wasn’t even sure what she was crying about. She hated that she couldn’t even understand herself, and she hated how everything made her feel._

_But Josie was better than crying outside at her best friend's birthday party, so she took a few breaths, swallowed up whatever it was that she was feeling, and got back inside to the loud music and the crowded people. She moved forward through the people, trying to find her twin sister, but instead she found her. She found Penelope._

_"JoJo!" Penelope yelled out in excitement as she saw Josie, and if Josie looked closely enough, she would’ve saw how her eyes sparkled the second they found the brunette, or how her entire face just lit up at the sight of her. But Josie did not pay attention, and she missed the rare sight._

_Penelope pulled her in for a tight embrace, holding her close and strong, and Josie felt her heart warming up to the feeling of the witch's body against her own, and slowly she returned the embrace._

_"I thought you might’ve bailed." Penelope broke the embrace and said quite loudly so Josie could hear her over the loud music. Josie simple nodded and wore and awkward smile, she really had no idea how to react._

_"Anyway, we were just heading out, so… have fun, okay?" The raven-haired girl announced awkwardly as well, wearing a tight smile and nodding back at the brunette._

_'We… who's we?' Josie thought to herself._

_And then Penelope turned her gaze back to meet the auburn-haired girl, and Josie's eyes followed her directions._

_'Oh.'_

_And Josie didn’t say a word, she just stood still and watched as Penelope took Hope's hand and lead her to the exit. And God, her heart had never felt this kind of rage before, this kind of hurt. Someone just punched her in the heart, and that someone happen to be Penelope Park._

_Her heart was completely wrenched at the sight of the two girls leaving the party together._

_Feelings sucked._

* * *

_"Hey, JoJo." Penelope greeted her the day after the party as she entered the class and sat in the table behind Josie, wearing her signature smirk as always._

_"Hey." Josie answered dryly and forced a polite smile on her face, she wished she was anywhere but right there with Penelope, especially after the events of last night. Penelope ignored the brunette's tone that seemed to be really unfit to Josette Saltzman, and simply opened her textbook._

_Dorian walked into the class and started teaching the origin of the species, which was probably Penelope's least favorite class, well right after math, she just felt like those subjects weren’t worthy of being stored in her mind._

_Or maybe it was just because she didn’t understand them?_

_The brunette tried to concentrate herself on the class, to listen to Dorian's words and wisdoms, but she felt too distracted by the presence of a certain witch, unsettled even. It's not like Penelope interrupted her during the class, but just the fact that she was there made Josie completely anxious._

_She felt like she wanted to confront Penelope about last night, about Hope, but then again, she had no right to do so. Penelope was just her friend, which Josie had to keep reminding herself that. Penelope Park was her friend, nothing more and nothing less._

_But then again, her friend was really pretty. And Josie found herself once again thinking about the witch's piercing eyes and smooth skin, and her beautifully shaped nose, and also her side profile which looked like it was crafted by the Gods. All of that really distracted her from the class because she wanted so bad to look at Penelope and to admire her beauty. But unfortunately, she couldn’t, and Josie felt herself counting the time that is left till the class is over, till she could finally turn around and look at the girl._

_Josie's bubble of thoughts burst completely when she felt someone tapping on her shoulder, she turned around and found Penelope. Finally, now it was her chance to get those glimpses of her features that she wanted so badly._

_Penelope handed her a folded torn page, a note, while winking at the brunette, and then returned her attention to her textbook._

_Josie felt her heart racing, no, screaming. Her hands slightly trembled while holding the note, she really doesn’t understand why this girl has this kind of effect on her. She continued to open the note slowly, her mind was making at least one hundred possible scenarios for what might be written on that piece of paper at each second._

**_'Meet me at our place after school is over?'_ ** _The words were written in cursive, black and bold, covering the entire page. Josie scrunched the paper and let out a large exhale, trying to wash away her anxiety._

_Penelope wanted to meet at the old mill, which wasn’t weird because usually this was their place for hangout, they would often spend their free time there, laughing and talking, sharing secrets from their pasts and enthuse about plants, or about stars. But what was strange was that Penelope asked her to meet her there, as if they weren’t there every single day._

_Perhaps Josie was just reading into it too much, overthinking as usual, but something did not sit right with her._

_Classes ended for the day and Josie's mind raced with questions about what Penelope wanted to tell her. Maybe it was nothing special, but Josie couldn’t help herself but form countless possible realities that might be led by their so called 'meeting'._

_The brunette was on her way to the old mill in order to meet her friend, but then her phone rang._

**_Lizzie calling…_ **

_Josie answered her phone only to be greeted by an extremely anxious and loud Lizzie. She was spiraling, yelling, crying too._

_"Okay calm down Lizzie, take a deep breath and tell me where you are." Josie said through the phone, her voice was calming and soft, but the truth was that she could also feel the mix of emotions and stress that her sister was experiencing right now._

_"I'm at our room!" The blonde yelled hysterically and loudly on the phone. "Jo, please come… I need you." She continued, this time her voice was quieter and weaker, and Josie could hear the sobs in her words._

_Josie hung up the phone call and sighed deeply, her heart felt torn, on the other side she wanted to know what Penelope wanted, she was actually dying to know. But on the other hand, Lizzie needed her, and the brunette knew where she had to be right now, even if that’s not what she wanted._

_So, she rushed into their shared room and found Lizzie, crying on the floor. Their clothes were all over the floor, their night lamps were broken, and a few books were lying on the floor wide open._

_"Lizzie, listen to me, take a deep breath." Josie put her arms on Lizzie's shoulders, talking to her with a soft and calming voice, guiding her to inhale and exhale a few breaths._

_The blonde's eyes quickly found their way to her sister's eyes, and she followed Josie's guidance. She took a few breaths, each one was slower and deeper than the one before, she felt how her senses slowed down._

_"What happened?" Josie asked softly while taking her sister into her arms, hugging her tightly and still._

_"Stupid Dad and his stupid Mikaelson pet." Lizzie let out bitterly in a mocking tone. She didn’t have to elaborate because her twin already knew what that meant, their father had chosen Hope over them once again, nothing new._

_Josie sighed, she wished she could say something that would serve as a comfort for her twin, something that would make her forget about their neglecting father, something that would take away her rage, and help her feel better._

_But there was nothing she could do, except for holding her still and listen to her whimpers._

* * *

_A few hours passed and the twins were still sitting on the floor, holding each other, laughing through their tears over stupid stuff, and talking about nonsense._

_"I think it's time to get some ice-cream." Lizzie suggested while smiling at her twin._

_"Yeah, I think so. Wait here I'm gonna get us some from the kitchen." Josie agreed and stood up in order to go to the kitchen and complete her mission._

_When she got there, she was encountered with no other than Penelope Park._

_Shit. She completely forgot to text her about not coming to the old mill._

_She hoped Penelope wasn’t mad and that it was nothing serious, but that hope expired the second the raven-haired girl faced her. Her lips were pressed firmly together, her jaw was clenched, and her eyes were cutting through Josie's soul like knives, like darts aimed at her. Her expression was icy and cold, with the hints of hurt and disappointment._

_And Josie felt her heart dropping down from her chest, she disappointed her, again._

_"Penelope…" Josie pleaded, her tone was full of regret, she knew she had failed the raven-haired girl and she hated how guilty she felt._

_Penelope took a deep breath and slowly closed her eyes shut, trying to calm the rage inside of her. "No, don’t." She said sharply and then opened her eyes again as one of her fingers was now pointed directly at Josie._

_She was mad, furious even, her blood was boiling, smoke was running out of her ears and her temper was short. She really did not want to hear what Josie had to say in her defense._

_"I had to go to take care of Lizzie, she was upset." Josie ignored Penelope's wishes and quickly excused herself, her heart was burning with guilt._

_"And you couldn’t even call? Text? You're so full of bullshit." Penelope spitted out, her tone came out aggressive, more than she intended for it to be, but she couldn’t help herself, she couldn’t hide how much this upset her._

_"I'm sorry… I forgot." Josie confessed with a weak and defeated tone, her gaze was now attached to the floor, she couldn’t bear looking at the raven-haired girl's shooting eyes again, she couldn’t bear watching the anger written all over Penelope's face while knowing that it was her fault._

_The witch simply shook her head at the brunette's words, "You forgot." She repeated, her voice was calmer and quieter, but colder, and clearly more hurt than before. She sighed heavily and walked past Josie, she needed to be anywhere else but there. Josie felt the ghost of Penelope's presence brushing next to her, and her heart just throbbed with pain and regret, her eyes became watery, and her body couldn’t move._

_"You know what, no. This isn’t fair. It isn’t fair that you keep treating me like I am a nobody to you, Penelope stopped at her tracks and turned around to face Josie, her voice was still hurt and cold, and her eyes were watery as well, "Not when we both know that’s not true." She whispered the latter._

_Josie swallowed the lump in her throat and turned around to meet the other girl, "What is that supposed to mean?" She furrowed at Penelope's words, not understanding the girl's intentions._

_"You know exactly what I mean." Penelope accused sharply, her expression was blank and empty but her voice still cold as ice._

_Josie froze, looking directly at Penelope, still trying to figure out what she had meant, still swimming in her ocean of thoughts, looking for an answer, but nothing came. So, she stayed frozen, wearing the most confused and baffled expression she could execute, making sure the other girl realized she didn’t understand her._

_Or… maybe she did, but wasn’t ready to admit it, not yet._

_Maybe she tried to challenge Penelope, to make her be the one who would say those words, just so she won't end up looking like a fool._

_Penelope watched Josie frowning deeply at her words, she watched how she stayed still without saying a single word, while her lips were parted, and her eyes were devouring Penelope's whole._

_The witch sighed once again, her entire body was shaking now, "I know that you like me." Penelope let out breathless, and her face softened slightly at her own words. Her gaze was now fully concentrating at the brunette's reaction, she watched as her whole body stiffened and her eyebrows were raised at her. She watched as she attempted to open her mouth and say something, but closed it shut mere moments later._

_"How…" That was the only thing that Josie managed to voice out, although her brain was currently storming with things she wanted to say, to ask, with things she wanted to do, but that was the only thing she managed to let out._

_"I can tell by the way you look at me." Penelope explained, her voice was calm this time. "I should know, because I look at you the same way." The raven-haired girl admitted, her voice was softer, her eyes were glinting, her cheeks slowly turned pink, and her lips curled into a thin line once again, trying to hide whatever emotions she was feeling._

_Josie felt her entire body screaming, yelling, so loud it hurt, every single part of her reacted to Penelope's words, every fiber of her skin burned, tingled, ached to touch the raven-haired girl, to feel her closer to her. Every cell in her brain was exploding with excitement, and her heart was pounding harshly in her chest. She felt breathless, her face was flushing, and her body's temperature was raising._

_Penelope Park liked her back._

_"Then what happened between you and Hope last night?" Josie remarked, moving forward closer to Penelope, she was pouting, and her brows were still furrowed at the witch. She knew she had no right to demand an answer from Penelope, especially not now, but she couldn’t help how the jealousy was eating her from inside._

_Penelope scoffed at the girl's ridiculous question, was Josie really pulling the jealousy card right now?_

_"She helped me prepare you something at the old mill." Penelope said once again with a serious and cold tone. "I wanted to tell you how I felt today." She admitted once again, her heart was on her sleeve, just as she hated it. Sometimes she finds it amusing to how the brunette makes her feel things she had never felt before, how Josie could break through the walls Penelope had built so carefully during the years without batting an eye, to how she doesn’t feel the need to pretend around Josie._

_Josie took in a shaky breath at the realization, and that was it, she couldn’t handle this anymore, she couldn’t wait any longer, not when every inch of her skin was craving for one thing._

_So, she let the impulse to take over her senses, she let her emotions take over her logic, and quickly moved closer to Penelope, cupping her face with both of her hands and crashing her lips into hers, kissing her with so much want and desire, feeling the girl's warm lips against hers, and tasting her sweet chapstick, and she wished she could stay in that moment forever._

_The shorter girl's pulse could be felt through her lips, vibrating and beating in a perfect melody against the brunette's flesh, and her scent filtered through Josie's nostrils, and something about that felt so intoxicating and addicting that Josie just couldn't rest against the feeling._

_And while the taller girl's lips explored Penelope's, her hands were occupied with gently feeling the skin of the raven-haired girl's face, so soft and so smooth, just like Josie imagined it to be. It was so warm against her palms and so soothing to touch._

_The sudden movement caught Penelope by surprise, and she took a step back from the kiss, Josie's hands still cupping her cheeks, and both of them went breathless, their flesh was growing into darker shades of red. Both were shocked by the sudden turn of events. Penelope's eyes flicked between the brunette's beautiful big brown eyes to her full and soft pink lips, she smiled at the girl and watched her smiling right back at her with such softness, she was so beautiful, it was almost impossible not to fall for her._

_Penelope moved to close the gap between them, reuniting their lips once again, kissing Josie with such softness and tenderness that it drove the brunette almost insane. Her hands found their way to Josie's cheeks, cupping them as well, trying to pull the girl as close as possible to her lips, she couldn’t get enough of her._

_The touch of their lips sent a shiver down Penelope's spine, electrizing her senses and her body, her palms were burning against the touch of Josie's skin, and everything about that moment sent Penelope to such a high, a high she couldn’t get enough of._

_Their hearts were pounding fast, racing in a perfect sync, their hands were softly caressing the other's cheeks, and their lips were dancing on each other's._

_When their lips left each other's, and Josie felt her mind resenting herself for it, all she wanted to do was kiss Penelope for one more time, to feel her pulse against hers, to smell her ridiculously amazing flowery perfume, to taste her chapstick just one more time, she was like a drug and Josie was an addict._

_But although their lips were no longer firmed against each other's, they did not move, their hands were still cupping the other's face, and their foreheads leaned against each other, both of the girl were smiling, breathing out and feeling the other's warm breaths against their skin. Their eyes were shining with emotions, both were wearing a wonderstruck expression, both were content, their heart's wishes were finally answered._

**_Finally._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well once again im sorry it took a long time for me to update, as most of you probably know im not really much at home lately so i dont have the time to write that often, but anyway i hope you can be patient with me. anyways tell me what you thought about this chapter in the comments!  
> if you can give me a feedback about my writing or about the plot i would very much love that because if i am being honest i feel very insecure writing and i just dont know and dont feel like im doing it right, so if you can help me figure it out and give me some tips i would love that♥ thank you for reading!


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